"Yes--the work for which I live, which is my goal and mainstay and
future; which takes the place of father and mother and friends and
lover. For which this draught of wine was vintaged, and this hour
created, and you yourself, you with your lovely, delicate beauty and
your two begging hands, which were really fashioned for giving."
"I thought you wanted to speak of your work," said Lilly, softly.
"I am speaking of it. I always speak of it. I only want to show you how
restlessly it absorbs my experiences. How many, for instance, have sung,
painted and sculptured the Annunciation! And how many scholars have
grubbed over it! Yet when I see the good, humble, astonished, almost
frightened Virgin Mary eyes you are making this very instant, I feel the
final word has not been spoken, the supreme conception is still to be
formed. You see, that is the way everything must serve my work."
"Are you a poet?" asked Lilly, completely taken.
He smiled and shook his head.
"I'm neither a poet nor a painter, nor a historian, nor a psychologist.
Yet I must be something of each, and more to boot. My work requires it."
Then he told his story.
His father had been instructor at a university and an eminent jurist.
His mother had died in giving him birth, and his father did not survive
her long. He then came under the care of his uncle, a rich, experienced
old bachelor, who had passed a lively life in business and
pleasure-seeking, and now dwelt in merry singleness in his castle. He
had given Dr. Rennschmidt an education and had assured him a small
income which enabled him in a modest fashion to indulge his wishes and
whims. Dr. Rennschmidt had intended to follow in his father's footsteps
and enter an academic career, but the examinations, which he had passed
honourably, had tried his health. So, to satisfy his uncle, he had given
up the idea of a university career for the time being, and had gone out
into the world. He had been drawn to Italy by his studies in the history
of art, which he had always pursued with interest, though without
considering them his life work. What fascinated him more than the
churches and the museums was the free, beautiful humanity in which the
lively southern race expressed its personality. He felt as if it had
awakened in him a new, free humanity, conscious of its own powers. He
felt more and more strongly the original unity of artistic and personal
experience, past and present. The heroes of mythology and history, the
characters in poetry and painting, and the poets and painters themselves
all became so real and familiar that they seemed to be part of his own
being. Surrounded by a people saturated with its own history, possessing
the skill of a thousand years' exercise of art, always in touch with the
spirit of the time, it seemed possible to him to penetrate into the
emotional world of past generations. He learned to distinguish
monuments of different periods and follow those related to each other
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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