"Did you ever hear of such a short sport? Wanted to buy it by the keg and go sit under a tree in Bronx Park. As soon as Alla run out of language she sat down and in less than three hours doped out an answer. I got it here on the back of her laundry list: "A book of verse is not what I can use, But give me, if still my love is thine, A wine list from which to pick and choose. Cut out the shady bough for mine. "Give your bough to some nice 'feller,' And if you would make my life sublime Put me in some cool rathskeller And we'll forget the jug of wine. "Wine in a jug! What do I hear? Not with a loaf of bread and thou, A cheese sandwich and a glass of beer, Unless you've changed your brand ere now. "This sitting in the wilderness may be fine For those who the realms of nature seek, A restaurant is at least a paradise divine With payday on the first of every week. "I guess maybe that won't show him up! Ain't it just glorious? It's kinda wabbly on its feet, but just think, it's her first attempt. She said there were a lot more things she could say, but even her desire to be a poetess wouldn't let her forget that she was a lady. Alla told me that the height of her ambition was to write the words of a popular song and have Harry Von Seltzer sing it in the College Inn. She can't ever make a hit as a poem producer though 'cause she hasn't got high cheek bones and teeth like a squirrel. Alla was pensive all through the first act, and while she was making her change from a lady-in-waiting to a bathing girl she remarked that she was going to write an ode--past tense of I O U, I guess--entitled 'Thoughts on Hearing Ben Teal Conduct a Chorus Rehearsal.' They won't let her publish it. "What do you know about the new law about tanks having to have their names on the barroom door? I see where the Metropole will lose money unless they furnish disguises to their steady customers. Can you imagine the suspense certain parties will feel when they rush into a shop for their early morning 'thought mop' and have to cling to the bar while Arthur looks up their past performances in Bingham's Bartenders' Guide.