But, on the other hand, Wilbur isn't there with a very big fresh air fund, and by perseverance I might cop out a Pittsburg millionaire and become famous. Marriage is worse than a lottery; it's a strong second for the show business. You never can tell. Wilbur sure does treat me nice--he's promised that I shall be a flower girl at the Friar Festival when it comes off in May. Ain't that nice of him? Gee, but that's going to be the grand doings. Are you going to the ball? Say, the round of festivities I am pulling off lately would make a person think I was a society bud. Oh, come closer, listen. A certain party wants me to go out in vaudeville. What do you know about that? Can you see me doing two-a-day and getting in a contest with Eva Tanguay or Vesta Victoria or the Russell Brothers. I would go in a minute, though I promised mother when I quit burlesque that I would never again wear tights. When I was in the business if I couldn't get a job on my voice all I had to do was to flash a photo taken as Captain of the High Jinks Cadets, and then--in a minute. Flo. Ziegfield made me all kinds of offers to go in the "Soul Kiss," but the blondes were all full, and you can see me in a brindle wig? I am willing to sacrifice nearly anything for Art, but when it comes to leaving nineteen dollars' worth of puffs in a dressing room where you can't pick your company, not for little Sabrina. I used to have trouble enough with my number eighteen and lip stick and the bunch of near-lady kleptomaniacs that the manager made a great mistake taking on the road in the last show I was with. Well, to get back to vaudeville, I don't know whether to do a single turn or put on a big act with a dancing scene or a prizefight in it. Those things go big nowadays. I could get the music publishers to slip me a little on the side for using their songs, too. Of course I don't need the money, for I've got the biggest part of that ten thou. inheritance left yet; but still it would keep me busy and away from the cafes, for now all I do all day long is to roam around from one place to another imbibing booze and balloon juice. It's beautiful billiards all right for the time being, but I always feel so on the blink the next morning. Wilbur doesn't care; that is, he said he knew I had artistic temperament, and if I wanted to get it out of my system, vaudeville was as good as anything. I was talking to a guy the other day that is in vaudeville, and he said that down around the St. James Building you could buy acts by the pound. Another guy wanted to take my money and star me in a musical comedy. Wasn't he the kind gent? Gee, I didn't tell you how Wilbur come to get pinched, did I? Well, it was this way: