The Sorrows of a Show Girl: A Story of the Great "White Way"McGaffey, Kenneth
General
The Sorrows of a Show Girl: A Story of the Great "White Way"
McGaffey, Kenneth
Theater -- Fiction
"We had got up to nearly opposite 155th street by this time and some of
the less experienced members of the jolly gang were commencing to worry
that they would never see Broadway again and stationed a lookout in the
bow to find Albany. Aye, aye, the deck, water sighted on the port beam.
On duty, captain. These noodley dames were strong for reversing and
returning to our harbor, which we had not seen for these many years--ah,
the brave sailor lad; alas, he had to remain away from home at night--so
Wilbur started to turn the boat around.
"I think he must have thought he was driving a street car, for instead
of reversing like any white man would, he pulled off an evolution that
was a peach.
"All of the wind ducked out of the sail gag for a minute and the boat
spun around, then, all of a sudden, it filled again, and, bingo! the
scow slowly lays over on her side an dies. The outfit fell into the
water kerplunk. I think I touched the bottom nine times before I grabbed
the side of the boat. I remember distinctly of passing a fish so often
that we got on speaking terms.
"When I got the briny out of my lamps and took a pike around, there was
the whole works clinging to the side of the boat looking like a flock of
wet cats.
"The remarks they made to Wilbur I would not repeat here, for he is to
be my future husband. The water was as cold as a flat in the Winter time
and nothing in sight.
"One of the dames, I wouldn't be surprised if it was that Alla party,
suggested that we lash a man to the rigging and let him look for help.
Another was strong for turning the flag upside down as a signal of
distress. Louie Zweibaum nearly drowned because he had to use both hands
to tell her that the rigging was under water.
"We, all between shivers, turned loose a Rebel yell for help and pretty
soon along comes a tugboat bound downtown. That drove up alongside and
after the captain found out that we had money they hoisted us on deck
and took the sloop for a tow.
"Take it from me, I was never so glad to get near a fire in my life. The
skipper of the cheese let us get in the engine room and dry out. Can you
see that wet bunch of fluffs with all the highlight off and their
marcels around their necks. I'll bet there was a whole lot of surprises
sprung when the true complexion began to show up. We got fairly well
fixed up by the time we got down to where we had to go to get the rest
of our stuff and when we once again touched mother earth and the captain
of the boat had touched us we took it on the run for a cafe, and let me
tell you the market price on hot drinks closed strong in Harlem that
night.
"We fixed Gym's boat up and gave it back to him the next day. Nobody
caught cold and everything in the garden's lovely.
"Now, dearie, I can call you dearie, for I am soon to be a married woman
and it will be all right. Now, dearie, don't forget the big Festival
Thursday afternoon, for I will count on your being there to help the
crowd.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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