A bright fire was glowing on the hearth, the place was all dusted, tidy
and cheerful, even though the world outside was a blank wall of fog.
He stood up in the middle of the room. Tall, columnar, with a great
dignity about him, had there been any one there to see. It was a dual
dignity, the dignity of supreme success and the dignity of irremediable
pain.
The butler came in with the letters upon a copper tray. There was a
great pile of them, and as the man closed the door after he put the tray
upon the writing-table, Sir William began to deal the letters like a
pack of cards, throwing this and that one on the floor, with a shuffling
movement of the wrist, and as he did so his eyes were horrid in their
searching and their intensity. At last he came to the one he sought. A
letter addressed to him in a bold but feminine handwriting. As his
fingers touched it a loud sob burst out into the silence of the room.
With shaking fingers he tore it open, standing among the litter of the
unopened letters, and began to read.
He read the letter right through, then walked to the mantel-piece,
leaning his right arm upon it as if for support. But the tension was now
a little relaxed. He had come down to find the worst, to meet the
inevitable. He had met it, and there was now neither premonition of the
moment of realization nor the last and torturing flicker of despairing
hope.
This was the letter. It began without preface or address--
"You must have known this was coming. Everything in your manner has
shown me that you knew it was coming. And for that, unhappy as I
am, I am glad. I have a terrible confession to make to you. But
you who are so great, you who know the human mind from your great
height, as a conquering general surveys a country from a
mountain-top, you will understand. When you asked me to marry you
and I said 'Yes,' I was pleased and flattered, and I had a
tremendous admiration and respect for you and for all you have
done. Then when we came to know each other, I began to see the
human side of you, and I had, and if you will let me say so, still
have, a real affection for you. And had it not been that something
more powerful than affection has come into my life, I would have
been a true and faithful wife and companion to you.
"But you have seen, and you must know, that things are changed. Are
we not all subject to the laws of destiny, the laws of chance? Is
it not true that none of us on our way through the world can say by
whom or how we shall be caught up out of ourselves and changed into
what we could not be before? Oh, you know it all. You of all men
know it!
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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