The Southern Literary Messenger, Vol. I., No. 7, March, 1835Various
History
The Southern Literary Messenger, Vol. I., No. 7, March, 1835
Various
American literature -- 19th century -- Periodicals
My baptismal name is Egæus--that of my family I will not mention. Yet
there are no towers in the land more time-honored than my gloomy,
grey, hereditary halls. Our line has been called a race of
visionaries: and in many striking particulars--in the character of the
family mansion--in the frescos of the chief saloon--in the tapestries
of the dormitories--in the chiseling of some buttresses in the
armory--but more especially in the gallery of antique paintings--in
the fashion of the library chamber--and, lastly, in the very peculiar
nature of the library's contents, there is more than sufficient
evidence to warrant the belief.
The recollections of my earliest years are connected with that
chamber, and with its volumes--of which latter I will say no more.
Here died my mother. Herein was I born. But it is mere idleness to say
that I had not lived before--that the soul has no previous existence.
You deny it. Let us not argue the matter. Convinced myself I seek not
to convince. There is, however, a remembrance of ærial forms--of
spiritual and meaning eyes--of sounds musical yet sad--a remembrance
which will not be excluded: a memory like a shadow, vague, variable,
indefinite, unsteady--and like a shadow too, in the impossibility of
my getting rid of it, while the sunlight of my reason shall exist.
In that chamber was I born. Thus awaking, as it were, from the long
night of what seemed, but was not, nonentity at once into the very
regions of fairy land--into a palace of imagination--into the wild
dominions of monastic thought and erudition--it is not singular that I
gazed around me with a startled and ardent eye--that I loitered away
my boyhood in books, and dissipated my youth in reverie--but it _is_
singular that as years rolled away, and the noon of manhood found me
still in the mansion of my fathers--it is wonderful what stagnation
there fell upon the springs of my life--wonderful how total an
inversion took place in the character of my common thoughts. The
realities of the world affected me as visions, and as visions only,
while the wild ideas of the land of dreams became, in turn,--not the
material of my every-day existence--but in very deed that existence
utterly and solely in itself.
* * * * *
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