“It is unnecessary to protract this scene; suffice it to say, the fate of all other tyros was mine of course, that after acquiring moderate gains, I began to lose, that as I lost my money, I lost my prudence, that although, to outward seeming, I was calm as a stoic, (for my pride was strong enough to effect that falsity,) within me there raged a boiling hell of passion, and as stake after stake was swept from me, I verily do believe I could have stabbed the winner to the heart. When the game ceased, I had been stripped of all my ready money, and was largely in debt. It was near morning. I threw myself into a chair and fell into what was rather stupor than sleep. {753} “With the early dawn, I shook off my lethargy, and with a head fevered, and a heart aching from the dissipation of the night, I set out on my return home, which was but a few miles distant. Although my absence, on the previous night, had been unpremeditated and unavoidable, my conscience, as it whispered over the list of my late transgressions, numbered this as one of them. I knew I should be greeted with affectionate smiles, and felt how unworthy I was to receive them, and that was a bitter pang. Is it not a marvel that men should ever be tempted to the commission of a second moral offence, when the punishment for the first is so severe? But the head-ache of the drunkard and the repentance of the gambler are alike forgotten, when temptation again assails them. “As I rode along, a prey to remorse, I made many excellent resolutions. I determined to sell off my racing stock, content myself with viewing the sport, and never again to bet upon it. Cards I would never touch; my time should be occupied in the cultivation of my estates, and for relaxation, I would depend on literature and the conversation of my domestic circle. Finally, I resolved to communicate to my wife all that had occurred, and give her the promises I was making to myself. By the time I reached home, I had contrived, by these means, to restore, in a great measure, my self-complacency, and I almost flattered myself that I had gained a moral victory before I had even encountered the foe. “Emily met me at the door, with a thousand welcomes. ‘How kind it is in you,’ she said, ‘to come so early! I knew when the storm came on, that I could not see you last night, and I hardly hoped you would have been so early a riser.’ ‘But dearest,’ continued she, ‘you must have passed an uncomfortable night, your eyes are heavy, and inflamed. Are you not well?’ “‘Oh yes, very well,’ I replied, ‘but there was a great crowd at the tavern, and I could not sleep; a good breakfast, however, will soon restore me.’ “‘Were you successful yesterday, Charles?’ “‘Quite so,’ said I; ‘my colt surpassed my expectations; I shall not take a trifle for him.’ “‘Why, do you mean to sell him?’ “‘Him, and all the others. I am determined to quit the turf, Emily.’