The Southern Literary Messenger, Vol. II., No. 12, November, 1836Various
General
The Southern Literary Messenger, Vol. II., No. 12, November, 1836
Various
American literature -- 19th century -- Periodicals
Multitudes are unqualified for a constant and warm reciprocation of
benevolence, by perpetual attention to their interest, and unresisting
subjection to their passions; many varieties of dispositions also, not
inconsistent with the common degrees of virtue, may exclude friendship
from the heart. Some, ardent enough in their benevolence, are mutable
and uncertain, soon attracted by new objects, disgusted without
offence, and alienated without enmity. Others are soft and flexible,
easily influenced by reports and whispers, ready to catch alarms from
every dubious circumstance, and to listen to every suspicion which
envy and flattery shall suggest. Some are impatient of contradiction,
more willing to go wrong by their own judgment, than to be indebted
for a safer and better way to the sagacity of others, inclined to
consider counsel as insult, and inquiry as want of confidence. Some
are dark and involved, equally careful to conceal good and bad
purposes, and pleased by showing their design only in the execution.
Others are unusually communicative, alike open to every eye, and
equally profuse of their own secrets and those of others, ready to
accuse without malice, and to betray without treachery. Any of these
may be useful to the community, and pass through the world with the
reputation of uncorrupted morals, but they are unfit for close and
tender intimacy. He cannot properly be chosen for a friend, whose
kindness is exhaled by its own warmth, or frozen by the first blast of
slander—he cannot be a useful counsellor who will hear no opinion but
his own—he will not much invite confidence, whose principal maxim is
to suspect—nor can the candor and frankness of that man be much
esteemed, who spreads his arms to human kind, and makes every man,
without distinction, a denizen of his bosom. Such is the picture of
human disposition, drawn by the pen of that great moral master.
Having taken a view of the difficulties to be met with, I shall next
take notice of those qualifications which seem necessary to obtain
real and permanent friendship: and here we shall find that virtue is
the only sure solid basis on which it can be built: if founded on
other or less worthy motives, its continuance is short and precarious:
as those motives shift and vary, it will vary with them: Cicero, in
the treatise from which I have taken the prefatory lines says, “Nec
sine virtute, amicitia esse ullo pacto potest.” Such unions deserve
not the name of friendship; they are rather confederacies, so much the
more dangerous and hurtful, as the uniting causes are mean and
vicious.
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