The Story of a Doctor's Telephone—Told by His WifeFirebaugh, Ellen M.
General
The Story of a Doctor's Telephone—Told by His Wife
Firebaugh, Ellen M.
Physicians -- Anecdotes; Wit and humor
"But how can I get word to you? They have no 'phone or that man wouldn't
have come after you."
"Well, I have promised Hanson and I'll have to go there. If he 'phones
before I get back tell him he'll have to come down to Stetson's after
me. Or, you might wake one of the boys and send him over."
"I'd rather try to wake Rip Van Winkle," said Mary, in a tone that
settled it.
In about an hour the doctor was back and snuggling down under the
covers.
"They've got a fine boy over to Stetson's," he announced to his sleepy
wife.
"They have!" she exclaimed, almost getting awake. Again they slept.
Ting-a-ling-ling-ling. Ting-a-ling-ling-ling. Ting-a-ling-ling-ling.
"That's Hanson," exclaimed the doctor springing up and groping his way
to the 'phone.
"Yes."
"Out where?"
"Smith's on Parks avenue?.... _Not_ Smith's?.... I understand--a little
house farther down that street..... Yes, I'll come..... O, as soon as I
can dress and get there."
Mary heard, but when he had gone, was soon in a deep sleep.
By and by she found herself flinging off the covers and hurrying
guiltily toward the summoning tyrant, her subconscious self telling her
that this was the third peal.
"Hello."
"Is the doctor there, Mrs. Blank?"
"No, he is over at Stetson's. He said if you 'phoned to tell you you
would have to come there as they have no 'phone."
"Wait a minute, Mrs. Blank," said the voice of central, "some one is
trying to speak--"
"What have I said!" thought Mary suddenly, thoroughly awake. "He got
back from Stetson's and went to another place. But I don't know what
place nor where it is."
The kindly voice of central went on:
"It's the doctor who is talking, Mrs. Blank. I understand now. He says
if that message comes you are to 'phone him at James Smith's on Parks
avenue."
Mary looked at the clock. "So he's been there all this time. That stork
is a little too busy tonight," she thought as she went shivering back to
bed.
Toward daylight she was roused by the return of her husband, who
announced a new daughter in the world and then they went to sleep. The
next morning she said, "John, I've just thought of something. Why didn't
you have central 'phone you at Smith's if Hanson called and save me all
that bother?"
"I guess it's because I'm so used to bothering you Mary, that I didn't
think of it."
* * * * *
Mary was upstairs cleaning house most vigorously when the ring came. She
stopped and listened. It came again--three. She set the dust pan down
and went.
"I'll have to be out for an hour or more, Mary," said the doctor.
"I heard that sigh," he laughed, "but it won't be very hard to sort of
keep an ear on the 'phone, will it? Johnson may get in soon and then it
won't be necessary."
"Very well, then, John," and she went upstairs, leaving the doors open
behind her.
She had just reached the top when she had to turn about and retrace her
steps.
"Hello." No answer.
"Is someone calling Dr. Blank's house or office?"
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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