The Story of a Doctor's Telephone—Told by His WifeFirebaugh, Ellen M.
General
The Story of a Doctor's Telephone—Told by His Wife
Firebaugh, Ellen M.
Physicians -- Anecdotes; Wit and humor
In a minute he had found it: Millie Hastings--so many visits at such and
such a date, amounting to thirty-six dollars. He went back to the
'phone.
"Do you make your money by working by the week?"
"Yes, sir."
"Have you learned how to save it?"
"Yes, sir, I had to. I have to help mother."
"Your bill is eighteen dollars."
He heard a little gasp, then a delighted voice said: "I was afraid it
would be a good deal more. And now Dr. Blank, I want to ask a favor of
you."
"Ask away."
"I brought four dollars to town with me today to pay on my bill, but I
want a rocking chair _so_ bad--I'm over here at the furniture store
now--and there's such a nice one here that just costs four dollars and I
thought maybe you'd wait a----"
"_Certainly_ I will. Get the rocking chair by all means," and he laughed
heartily as he went out to the buggy. He climbed in and drove away, the
smile still lingering on his face. At the outskirts of the town a tall
girl hailed him from the sidewalk. He stopped.
"I was just going to your office to get my medicine," she said.
"I left it with the man there. He'll give it to you."
"Must I take it just like the other?"
"Yes. Laugh some, though, just before you take it."
"Why?"
"Because you won't feel like it afterward."
The girl looked after him as he drove on.
"He's laughing," she said to herself and a grin overspread her face as
she pursued her leisurely way.
* * * * *
Ting-a-ling-ling-ling-ling-ling-ling!!!
"Must be something unusual," thought Mary as the doctor went to the
'phone.
"Doctor, is this you?"
"Yes."
"Come out to John Lansing's quick!"
"What's the matter?"
"My wife swallowed poison. Hurry, Doctor, for God's sake!"
In a few minutes the doctor was on his horse (the roads being too bad
for a buggy) and was off. We will follow him as he plunges along through
the darkness.
Because of the mud the horse's progress was so slow that the doctor
pulled him to one side, urged him on to the board walk, much against his
inclination, and went clattering on at such a pace that the doors began
to fly open on both sides of the street and heads, turned wonderingly
after the fleeting horseman, were framed in rectangles of light.
"What _is_ the matter out there?" The angle of the heads said it so
plainly that the doctor laughed within himself as he thundered on. Now
it chanced that one of the heads belonged to a Meddlesome Matty who,
next day, stirred the matter up, and that evening two officers of the
law presented themselves at Dr. Blank's office and arrested him.
"I don't care anything about the fine. All I wanted was to get there,"
he said, handing out the three dollars.
After the horse left the board walk the road became more solid and in
about ten minutes the doctor arrived at his destination. Before he could
knock the door was opened. The patient sat reclining in a chair,
motionless, rigid, her eyes closed.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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