newspapers, as the remembrance of that ghastly enigma faded from the
minds of their readers, and solicitude about it ceased to occupy the
police. The tide of life, rolling that poor waif amid its waters, had
swept on. Yes; but I, the son? How should I ever forget the old woman's
story that had filled my childhood with tragic horror? How should I ever
cease to see the pale face of the murdered man, with its fixed, open
eyes? How should I not say: "I will avenge thee, thou poor ghost?" Poor
ghost! When I read _Hamlet_ for the first time, with that passionate
avidity which comes from an analogy between the moral situation depicted
in a work of art and some crisis of our own life, I remember that I
regarded the Prince of Denmark with horror. Ah! if the ghost of my
father had come to relate the drama of his death to me, with his
unbreathing lips, would I have hesitated one instant? No! I protested to
myself; and then? I learned all, and yet I hesitated, like him, though
less than he, to dare the terrible deed. Silence! Let me return to
facts.
IV
I remember little of succeeding events. All was so trivial,
insignificant, between that first vision of horror and the vision of woe
which came to me two years later, that, with one exception, I hardly
recall the intervening time. In 1864 my father died; in 1866 my mother
married M. Jacques Termonde. The exceptional period of the interval was
the only one during which my mother bestowed constant attention upon me.
Before the fatal date my father was the only person who had cared for
me; at a later period there was no one at all to do so. Our apartment in
the Rue Tronchet became unbearable to us; there we could not escape from
the remembrance of the terrible event, and we removed to a small hotel
in the Boulevard de Latour-Maubourg. The house had belonged to a
painter, and stood in a small garden which seemed larger than it was
because other gardens adjoined it, and overshadowed its boundary wall
with greenery. The centre of the house was a kind of hall, in the
English style, which the former occupant had used as a studio; my mother
made this her ordinary sitting-room. Now, at this distance of time, I
can understand my mother's character, and recognise that there was
something unreal and slightly theatrical about her, which, although it
was very harmless, led her to exaggerate the outward expression of all
her feelings. While she occupied herself in studying the attitudes by
which her emotions were to be fittingly expressed, the sentiments
themselves were fading away. For instance, she chose to condemn herself
to voluntary exile and seclusion after her bereavement, receiving only a
very few friends, of whom M. Jacques Termonde was one; but she very soon
began to adorn herself and everything around her with the fine and
subtle tastefulness that was innate in her. My mother was a very lovely
woman; her beauty was of a refined and pensive order, her figure was
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