Was he sincere in proposing this tête-à-tête drive which was so
contrary to our habits? What was his motive: the wish to show me that he
had not even understood my attack, or the yearning of the sick man who
dreads to be alone? I accepted the offer at all hazards, in order to
continue my observation of him, and a quarter of an hour afterwards we
were speeding towards the Arc de Triomphe in that same carriage in which
I had seen him pass by me, beaten, broken, almost killed, after our
first interview. This time, he looked like another man. Warmly wrapped
in an overcoat lined with seal fur, smoking a cigar, waving his hand to
this person or that through the open window, he talked on and on,
telling me anecdotes of all sorts, which I had either heard or not heard
previously, about people whose carriages crossed ours. He seemed to be
talking before me and not with me, so little heed did he take of whether
he was telling what I might know, or apprising me of what I did not
know. I concluded from this--for, in certain states of mind, every mood
is significant--that he was talking thus in order to ward off some fresh
attempt on my part. But I had not the courage to recommence my efforts
to open the wound in his heart and set it bleeding afresh so soon. I
merely listened to him, and once again I remarked the strange contrast
between his private thoughts and the rigid doctrines which he generally
professed. One would have said that in his eyes the high society, whose
principles he habitually defended, was a brigand's cave. It was the hour
at which women of fashion go out for their shopping and their calls, and
he related all the scandals of their conduct, false or true. According
to him, one of these great ladies was the mistress of her husband's
brother, another was notoriously under the protection of an old
diplomatist who had enriched himself by a disgraceful marriage, a third
had married an imbecile widower, and, in order that she might inherit
the whole of his fortune, had incited the man's son to so vicious a life
that it had killed him at nineteen. He dwelt on all these stories and
calumnies with a horrid pleasure, as though he rejoiced in the vileness
of humanity. Did this mean the facile misanthropy of a profligate,
accustomed to such conversations at the club, or in sporting circles,
during which each man lays bare his brutal egotism, and voluntarily
exaggerates the depth of his own disenchantment that he may boast more
largely of his experience? Was this the cynicism of a villain, guilty of
the most hideous of crimes, and glad to demonstrate that others were
less worthy than he? To hear him laugh and talk thus threw me into a
singular state of dejection. We had passed the last houses in the Avenue
de Bois, and were driving along an alley on the right in which there
were but few carriages. On the bare hedgerows a beautiful light shone,
coming from that lofty, pale blue sky which is seen only over Paris. He
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