I knew that he had spent many years of his life--he must be now nearly
forty, which was a great age to me--in the service of an unhappy great
lady whose little kingdom had been unjustly taken from her, and in her
cause he had spent his patrimony which had once been great. And now
since she no longer lived, having given up her gentle soul some two
years after she had sought the shelter of the convent against a rough
world, he was free once more to devote his sword of Don Quixote to some
other lost cause.
I knew, furthermore, that he was reported to have raised money from Mr.
Dawson of Damerstown at ruinous interest to spend it in the service of
the Princess Pauline, and that he was now very poor, too poor to keep
his old home from going to pieces and being consumed by the damp and by
rats and mice and general decay.
People used to wonder he did not try to sell it. Indeed, it was common
talk that before Mr. Dawson had bought Damerstown he had tried to obtain
possession of Brosna, and that his offer had been refused by Anthony
Cardew with contempt. The common talk even found words for the refusal.
"What?" Captain Cardew was reported to have said. "You have plucked me
clean enough, God knows, but I keep my honour intact, and that forbids
that I should see Dawsons in the house where Cardews lived honourably
and wronged none but themselves."
The low sun going down in a blaze behind the trees brought these things
into my mind. I remember that the wood was as sweet from the scent of
the white-thorn and the lilacs and a thousand other sweet and fresh
things as though some heavenly censer swung there. The thrushes and the
blackbirds were singing their wildest as is their custom about sunset;
and below their triumphant songs you could hear the whole chorus of the
little birds' voices as well as the fiddling and harping of the myriad
field-crickets and grasshoppers. Then from the field beyond the wood I
could hear the corncrakes sawing away in the yet unmown grass, and there
were a great many wood-doves uttering their soft laments.
I have always loved the things of nature; but on this evening they had
less power than usual to soothe me. The shame of my recent encounter
with Richard Dawson kept sending the colour to my cheeks and the little
shocks of repulsion through my blood. I felt that if he had really
kissed me I must have killed him or myself. My fingers twitched as I
thought on a certain dagger, little but deadly, which lay in a glass
case in the picture-gallery, and I resolved that I would carry it in my
breast for the future on my country rambles lest I should meet again
with such rudeness as I had met to-day and have nothing with which to
defend myself.
I was so engaged in my thoughts as I walked along that I had not noticed
how far ahead of me Dido had run. But suddenly she was brought to my
mind by the most horrible yelping which made me run as fast as ever I
ran in my life.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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