EILEEN (_uneasily_). Getting better? I am, Stephen. I'm strong enough
to be up now, but Doctor Stanton wants me to take a good long rest this
time so that when I do get up again I'll be sure---- (_She breaks off
impatiently._) But don't let's talk about it. I'm all right. (Murray
_glances down at her face worriedly. She changes the subject._) You've
been over to see Doctor Stanton, haven't you?
MURRAY. Yes.
EILEEN. Did he examine you?
MURRAY. Yes. (_Carelessly._) Oh, he found me O.K. I'm fine and dandy,
as I said before.
EILEEN. I'm glad, Stephen. (_After a pause._) Tell about yourself--what
you've been doing. You've written a lot lately, haven't you?
MURRAY (_frowning_). No. I haven't been able to get down to
it--somehow. There's so little time to yourself once you get to know
people in New York. The sale of the stories you typed put me on easy
street as far as money goes, so I've felt no need---- (_He laughs
weakly._) I guess I'm one of those who have to get down to hard pan
before they get the kick to drive them to hard work.
EILEEN (_surprised_). Was it hard work writing them up here? You used
to seem so happy just in doing them.
MURRAY. I was--happier than I've been before or afterwards.
(_Cynically._) But--I don't know--it was a new game to me then and I
was chuck full of illusions about the glory of it. (_He laughs
half-heartedly._) Now I'm hardly a bit more enthusiastic over it than I
used to be over newspaper work. It's like everything else, I guess.
When you've got it, you find you don't want it.
EILEEN (_looking at him wonderingly--disturbed_). But isn't just the
writing itself worth while?
MURRAY (_as if suddenly ashamed of himself--quickly_). Yes. Of course
it is. I'm talking like a fool. I'm sore at everything because I'm
dissatisfied with my own cussedness and laziness--and I want to pass
the buck. (_With a smile of cheerful confidence._) It's only a fit.
I'll come out of it all right and get down to brass tacks again.
EILEEN (_with an encouraging smile_). That's the way you ought to feel.
It'd be wrong--I've read the two stories that have come out so far over
and over. They're fine, I think. Every line in them sounds like you,
and at the same time sounds natural and like people and things you see
every day. Everybody thinks they're fine, Stephen.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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