how to be found again, and how to be known again when found?
Kingston passed insensibly beyond the cheap materialism of orthodoxy.
He could not postulate an infinite gilded space where Isabel might
be eternally walking in her habit as she had lived on earth. This
invincible anthropomorphism, this obstinate survival of the savage
in us, by which we are all prone to imagine the dead as we saw them
in life, and familiar for ever by their earthly features, had now no
hold on Kingston. He knew that, whenever we may meet our dead again,
and wherever that may be, heart will call to heart, and soul be known
again to soul; but the features that we have known and loved, the
bones, the flesh, the softness, will all have passed long since into
other forms of life, merged in the huge kaleidoscope of the universe.
Perhaps, in circumstances less cogent, he might have conceived himself
as meeting the physical Isabel years hence in some glorified state,
yet recognisable to eyes that had known her on earth. The sight of
her relics, however, jarred him once and for all out of the puny,
materialistic dream. The blackened hideousness of them forced on his
attention the irrelevance of all physical forms. For a time they may be
everything, these forms and features; ultimately they go for nothing,
pass utterly, are dropped, discarded, alike by the love that wore
them and by the love that worshipped the spirit they clothed. No, he
had done for ever with the corporeal Isabel. Weaknesses and beauties
of shape were all destroyed, reduced to their native insignificance.
Yet Isabel remained. But he had lost her; she had passed beyond his
knowledge into dim places where, if ever she heard the cry of his soul
far off, she could not make him any answer. Now and then, perhaps, she
might call to him in return; in the whisper of the evening wind, in
the song of a bird; but never again in the accents he had known, from
the lips that he had watched; and, even so, she might call unceasingly
to the hungering ears of his soul, yet never be able to make them
understand whose voice it was that they heard. His deep certainty that
she still lived made the separation more paradoxical, more horrible
than ever to Kingston. To know that she was there, yet to call in vain;
never to see her, never to meet her, to be unable, through all his
days, to open up any means of communication with the thing he knew to
be still existing,--this was the ghastliest instance of Fate’s irony,
giving so much, yet making the gift so nugatory.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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