_Secretary_ Furniture easily moved. _Traditions_ A door always open for refuge. _Traités_ (_de paix_) A series of dinners paid for by a lavish government. _Uniform_ A bestarred and beribboned livery. _Visits_ The most important duty of a diplomat. _Wisdom_ Good to have, but easily dispensed with. _Xpectations_ A tree which seldom bears fruit. _Yawn_ What a diplomat does over his _rapports_. _Zeal_ Something a diplomat ought never to have too much of. THE SUNNY SIDE OF DIPLOMATIC LIFE WASHINGTON, 1875-1880 WASHINGTON, _November, 1875_. Dear Mother,--After my hurriedly written letter of the 24th you will know that we have arrived here safely. My first introduction to my first post as diplomat's wife was made unwittingly by a gentleman walking with a friend just behind me. "Who is that gentleman?" said he, indicating Johan. "That? That is the Minister of Denmark." I, struggling with an arm-load of flowers culled from well-intentioned friends at different stations on the road, my maid and Johan's valet bringing up the rear with the overflow of small baggage, passed unnoticed. Now we are quite established here, and I have already commenced my diplomatic duties. There seems to be no end of card-leaving and card-receiving, and a list of rules on etiquette (the Ten Commandments of a Diplomat) as long as your arm. I never knew of anything so confusing. I try to remember the things that I must do and the things that I must not do. How many cold shower-baths of reproval have I already received; how many unruly things have I already done! We are invited to many dinners, luncheons, and entertainments of all kinds. I am knee-deep in engagements, actually wading in them. The engagement-book you gave me is already overfilled. We were very much amused at the collection of newspaper cuttings you sent us. Johan thought the one describing him as "a massive blonde of magnificent proportions, whose pure heart and clean hands had won all hearts in Washington" [previous to winning mine], was much too personal. "The medals [his prized decorations] were not his fault, and should not be laid up against him; and as for the gold key which he wears on his back, it is considered a great honor, as few Danes have had it conferred on them, being, as it is, the key of the king's own bedchamber, and giving the wearer the privilege of entering there when he likes."