British -- France -- Fiction; Humorous stories; Riviera (France) -- Fiction; Spouses -- Fiction
All evils have their compensations; and this amiable weakness of Miss
Dorris sometimes became a source of joy to the community of Les
Oliviers, when properly manipulated by M. Isidore, for example. For
it was the especial delight of this fair young creature to impart
recently acquired knowledge to her neighbours, and recently acquired
knowledge being undigested, and in many cases hastily and
inaccurately received, sometimes emerges from its temporary lodging
in the brain in a changed, even unrecognizable, form. Moreover, M.
Isidore, having an imagination of unusual fertility and an impish
delight in mischief, was tempted to confide myths having only a
poetic and ideal foundation in fact, to the ear of Dorris, in the
sure anticipation of hearing them issue in some novel form from the
pink coral lips at _table d'hôte_; always providing he listened, as
he frequently did, unseen behind an open door, to the general buzz of
table talk, above which Miss Boundrish's arrogant treble shrilled
high and incessant. When the intelligence conveyed by the pink coral
lips was very wildly improbable, that every conscript, for example,
during his first month of service, was dieted entirely on frogs to
inspire him with martial courage, the thin man, usually silent,
would, very gently expressing astonishment, venture to ask the source
of Miss Boundrish's information.
"Oh, it's perfectly true, Mr. Welbourne," the overbearing treble
would scream down the table, "I had it from a man who had been in the
French army himself. The frogs are those little green things in the
tanks, that are beginning to make such a croaking every night. Of
course, you know that Mont Agel is _terrain militaire_, where nobody
is allowed to go for fear of disturbing these frogs, which are kept
in tanks on purpose. The diet is so stimulating, you know, it makes
the soldiers long to fight."
"Really?" the thin man would murmur pensively. "How very
interesting! What a remarkably ingenious people the French are!
Would such an idea ever occur to the dull British brain, do you
suppose?"
Then a smile would go round the table, and coughs and suppressed
chokings would be heard, and M. Isidore would dance with rapture in
the corridor outside, and, on being severely interrogated by
Ermengarde and the thin man afterwards, would truthfully say that he
only asked Mademoiselle if she had heard of this curious custom of
dieting on frogs for courage, and with regard to Mont Agel had
chanced to mention that the public were excluded from that, as from
all terrain militaire, and that many tanks containing frogs were
there, as everywhere in the hills.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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