The Thin Santa Claus: The Chicken Yard That Was a Christmas StockingButler, Ellis Parker
General
The Thin Santa Claus: The Chicken Yard That Was a Christmas Stocking
Butler, Ellis Parker
Christmas stories
"Find what?" asked Mrs. Gratz innocently, and the thin Santa Claus
sighed and walked around to the back of the house. Mrs. Gratz went
with him.
As Mrs. Gratz watched the thin man search the chicken yard for
toober-chlosis bugs all doubt that he was her Santa Claus left her
mind. He made a most minute investigation, but he did it more as a man
might search for a lost purse than as a health officer would search
for germs. He even got down on his hands and knees and poked under the
chicken house with a stick, and, when he had combed the chicken yard
thoroughly and had looked all through the chicken house, he even
searched the denuded vegetable garden in the back yard, and looked
over the fence into Mrs. Flannery's yard. Evidently he was not pleased
with his investigation, for he did not even say good-bye to Mrs.
Gratz, but went away looking mad and cross.
When Mrs. Gratz went into her house she took her seat in her
rocking-chair and began rocking herself calmly and slowly.
"'T was him done it, sure," said Mrs. Flannery.
"I don't like such come-agains, much," said Mrs. Gratz placidly. "I
try me to believe in such a Santy Claus, but I like not such
come-agains. In Germany did not Santy Claus come back so much. I don't
like a Santy Claus should be so anxious. Still I believes in him, but,
if he has too many such come-agains, I don't believe in him much."
"I would be settin' th' police on him, Santy Claus or no Santy Claus,"
said Mrs. Flannery vindictively; "th' mean chicken thief!"
"Oh," said Mrs. Gratz easily, "I guess I don't care much should a
nine-hundred-dollar Santy Claus steal some chickens. I ain't mad."
But she was a little provoked when another knock came at the door a
few minutes later, and when, on opening it, she saw the thin Santa
Claus before her again.
"So!" she said, "Santy Claus is back yet once!"
"What's that?" asked the man suspiciously.
"I say, what it is you want?" said Mrs. Gratz.
"Oh!" said the man. "Well, I ain't a-goin' to fool with you no longer,
Mrs. Gratz. I'm a-goin' to tell you right out what I am and who I am.
I'm a detective of the police, and I'm looking up a mighty bad
character."
"I guess I know right where you find one," said Mrs. Gratz politely.
"Now, don't be funny," said the thin Santa Claus peevishly. "Mebby you
noticed I didn't say nothing when you spoke about that padlock being
busted? Mebby you noticed how careful I looked over your chicken coop,
and how I looked over the fence into the next yard? Well, I won't fool
you. I ain't no chicken-yard inspector, and I ain't no chicken
buyer--them was just my detective disguises. I'm out detecting a
chicken thief--just a plain, ordinary chicken thief--and what I come
for is clues."
"Yes?" said Mrs. Gratz. "And what is it, such cloos? I haven't any
clooses."
The thin Santa Claus seemed provoked.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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