Canada -- Emigration and immigration -- Fiction; England -- Fiction; Older couples -- Fiction; Spouses -- Fiction
He was certainly _like_ a garden, as he stood at his house-door,
looking out. When most people open their doors and stare, the things
outside come awake, but they took no notice of Kirkby. The gardens,
as it were, did not even look up. They were no more disturbed by his
appearance than by one of their own shadows lying under the bushes, or
by the long, ghostly lines of the green and crystal hoar-frost.
He was old and gentle, like an English garden, but he was hale, too,
and not by any means run to seed. His clothes, good clothes, now
pleasantly shabby, had a mellow tone which blended softly with their
setting. His fresh complexion and faded but clear eyes had the pale
tints of some of his own blossoms. The very droop of his shoulders was
less like the slow curve which comes with age than the gentle stoop of
a flower.
Especially he loved the quietness because it was at this hour that he
had a vision of the gardens as he planned them for the year. This was
his creative time, these few moments before the men came and broke and
scattered his thoughts. It was then that he saw the long succession
of colours and kinds with which the gardens would sum up their rich
total before the winter came again. He would lose some of it later, of
course, owing to other people’s follies and fancies, and the stolid
frustration of concrete facts. But some of it would persist, even
through worries and contradictions and the hard blows of the northern
weather; so that, by the time the resting-months for the gardens came
round once more, he would always in some measure have fulfilled his
dream.
He was not always able to snatch these god-like moments in which he
controlled the future. Often enough, Mattie was downstairs first, and
he could not call up his pictures while she was working and talking.
Husbands and wives were so near to each other that they got in each
other’s way over things like those,--things that had to have you all to
themselves, or they would not come. But he always took his moments when
he could get them, because he needed them. His days were poorer without
them and the assurance they brought him, as days are poorer without a
prayer.
And just now was the time when the vision was strongest and clearest,
when there was promise of new life all around, and still it was only
promise. Like all artists, he saw his creation best when there was
still nothing but a blank page in front of him. It had then a clarity,
a sweep, a combined passion and restraint which it never achieved again
after he had once begun to work upon it. It altered, no matter how he
tried to preserve it. Alien ideas crept in, upsetting the balance of
his scheme. Beautiful ideas they were, too, sometimes, but they were
alien, nevertheless. Often he had tried to convince himself that the
altered plan was all for the best; but as soon as the springtime both
of the gardens and of his inspiration came round again, he knew that
the thing which he saw then was the finer and purer.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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