In the Autumn, when the third-raters had come back from their vacations,
the "evenings" at Miss Patten’s were resumed, and Overbeck hurried to
the very first meeting. He wanted to talk it all over with them. In
his chagrin and cruel disappointment he was hungry for some word of
praise, of condolement. He wanted to be told again, even though he had
begun to suspect many things, that he had succeeded where Kipling had
failed, that he was Stevenson with more refinement.
But the New Bohemians, the same women and fakirs and half-baked minor
poets who had "influenced" him and had ruined him, could hardly find
time to notice him now. The guest of the evening was a new little lion
who had joined the set. A symbolist versifier who wrote over the
pseudonym of de la Houssaye, with black, oily hair and long white hands;
him the Bohemians thronged about in crowds as before they had thronged
about Overbeck. Only once did any one of them pay attention to the
latter. This was the woman who had nicknamed him "Young Lochinvar."
Yes, she had read "Renunciations," a capital little thing, a little thin
in parts, lacking in _finesse_. He must strive for his true medium of
expression, his true note. Ah, art was long! Study of the new
symbolists would help him. She would beg him to read Monsieur de la
Houssaye’s "The Monoliths." Such subtlety, such delicious word-chords!
It could not fail to inspire him.
Shouldered off, forgotten, the young fellow crept back to his little
hall bedroom and sat down to think it over. There in the dark of the
night his eyes were opened, and he saw, at last, what these people had
done to him; saw the Great Mistake, and that he had wasted his
substance.
The golden apples, that had been his for the stretching of the hand, he
had flung from him. Tricked, trapped, exploited, he had prostituted the
great good thing that had been his by right divine, for the privilege of
eating husks with swine. Now was the day of the mighty famine, and the
starved and broken heart of him, crying out for help, found only a
farrago of empty phrases.
He tried to go back; he did in very fact go back to the mountains and
the cañons of the great Sierras. "He arose and went to his father,"
and, with such sapped and broken strength as New Bohemia had left him,
strove to wrest some wreckage from the dying fire.
But the ashes were cold by now. The fire that the gods had allowed him
to snatch, because he was humble and pure and clean and brave, had been
stamped out beneath the feet of minor and dilettante poets, and now the
gods guarded close the brands that yet remained on the altars.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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