"I wouldn't miss it for money, Jack," declared Vivian Baskerville.
"Such a clever chap as you be, and none of us ever knowed it. You
ought to go for Tom Fool to the riders.[3] I lay you'd make tons more
money than ever you will to Trowlesworthy Warren."
[3] _The Riders_--a circus.
"By the way, who is to be the Doctor?" asked Ned Baskerville.
"'Twasn't settled, Mr. Masterman."
Dennis collapsed blankly.
"By Jove, no! More it was," he admitted, "and I've forgotten all about
it. The Doctor's very important, too. We must have him before the
next rehearsal. For the present you can read it out of the book, Mark."
Mark Baskerville was prompting, and now, after St. George and the Bear
had made a pretence of wrestling, and the Bear had perished with much
noise and to the accompaniment of loud laughter, Mark read the Doctor's
somewhat arrogant pretensions.
"All sorts of diseases--
Whatever you pleases:
The phthisic, the palsy, the gout,
If the Devil's in, I blow him out.
* * * * * *
"I carry a bottle of alicampane,
Here, Russian Bear, take a little of my flip-flap,
Pour it down thy tip-tap;
Rise up and fight again!"
"Well said, Mark! 'Twas splendidly given. Why for shouldn't Mark be
Doctor?" asked Nathan.
"An excellent idea," declared Dennis. "I'm sure now, if the fair Queen
Sabra will only put in a word----"
Mark's engagement was known. The people clapped their hands heartily
and Cora blushed.
"I wish he would," said Cora.
"Your wish ought to be his law," declared Ned. "I'm sure if 'twas
me----"
But Mark shook his head.
"I couldn't do it," he answered. "I would if I could; but when the
time came, and the people, and the excitement of it all, I should break
down, I'm sure I should."
"It's past ten o'clock," murmured Miss Masterman to her brother.
The rehearsal proceeded: Jack Head, as the Bear, was restored to life
and slain again with much detail. Then Ned proceeded--
"I fought the Russian Bear
And brought him to the slaughter;
By that I won fair Sabra,
The King of Egypt's daughter.
Where is the man that now will me defy?
I'll cut his giblets full of holes and make his buttons fly."
"And when I've got my sword, of course 'twill be much finer," concluded
Ned.
Mr. Gollop here raised an objection.
"I don't think the man ought to tell about cutting anybody's giblets
full of holes," he said; "no, nor yet making their buttons fly. 'Tis
very coarse, and the gentlefolks wouldn't like it."
"Nonsense, Tom," answered the vicar, "it's all in keeping with the
play. There's no harm in it at all."
"Evil be to them as evil think," said Jack Head. "Now comes the song,
reverend Masterman, and I was going to propose that the Bear, though
he's dead as a nit, rises up on his front paws and sings with the rest,
then drops down again--eh, souls?"
"They'll die of laughing if you do that, Jack," declared Vivian. "I
vote for it."
But Dennis firmly refused permission and addressed his chorus.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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