TRANTO. Listen, please. Let me explain. The situation is this. Instinct has got hold of me. When I woke up this morning something inside me said: 'You must call at the Ministry for that young woman and walk home with her.' This idea seemed marvellously beautiful to me; it seemed one of the most enchanting ideas that had ever entered the heart of man. I thought of nothing else all the morning. When I reached the Ministry and you'd gone, I felt as if I'd been shot. Then I rushed here. If you hadn't been at home I don't know what I should have done. My fever has been growing every moment. Providentially you _are_ here. I give you fair warning that I'm utterly in the grip of an instinct which is ridiculously unconventional and which will brook no delay. I repeat, the hour is about to strike. HILDEGARDE (_rousing herself_). Before it actually strikes, I want to ask a question. TRANTO. But that's just what _I_ want to do. HILDEGARDE. Please. One moment of your valuable time. TRANTO. The whole of my life. HILDEGARDE. Last night, why did you advise papa to give way to mamma and accept the baronetcy? TRANTO. Did I? HILDEGARDE. It seems so. TRANTO. Well--er-- HILDEGARDE. You know it's quite against his principles, and against mine and Johnnie's, not to speak of yours. TRANTO. The fact is, you yourself had given me such an account of your mother's personality that I felt sure she'd win anyhow; and--and--for reasons of my own, I wished to be on the winning side. No harm in that, surely. And as regards principles, I have a theory about principles. Your father was much struck by it when I told him. HILDEGARDE. Namely? TRANTO. There are no principles in married life. HILDEGARDE. Oh, indeed! Well, there may not be any principles in your married life, but there most positively will be in mine, if I ever have a married life. And let me tell you that you aren't on the winning side after all--you're on the losing side. TRANTO. How? Has your-- HILDEGARDE. Johnnie and I have had a great interview with mamma, and she's yielded. She's abandoned the baronetcy. In half an hour from now the baronetcy will have been definitely and finally refused. TRANTO. Great Scott! HILDEGARDE. You're startled? TRANTO. No! After all, I might have foreseen that you'd come out on top. The day before yesterday your modesty was making you say that your mother could eat you. I, on the contrary, insisted that you could eat your mother. Who was right? I ask: who was right? When it really comes to the point--well, you have a serious talk with your mother, and she gives in! HILDEGARDE (_gloomily_). No! _I_ didn't do it. I tried, and failed. Then Johnnie tried, and did it without the slightest trouble. A schoolboy! That's why I'm so upset. TRANTO (_shaking his head_). You musn't tell me that, Miss Hilda. Of course it was you that did it. HILDEGARDE (_impatiently; standing up_). But I _do_ tell you.