FIRST O. L. Maria always _was_ peculiar--still, now I come to look, it's more like "brother," which is certainly _much_ more suitable. (_Continuing._) "She will have no--no bird's-marks ..." (Now, what _does_ that--should you think that meant "crows-feet"? Oh, no, _how_ stupid of me--_bridesmaids_, of course!)--"and will go to the otter a plain guy"--(Oh, Caroline really is _too_ ...)--"to the _altar_ in plain _grey_! She has been given such quantities of pea-nuts"--(very odd things to give a girl! Oh, _presents_! um, um)--"Not settled yet where to go for their hangman"--(the officiating clergyman, I suppose--very flippant way of putting it, I _must_ say! It's meant for _honeymoon_, though, I see, to be _sure_!) &c. &c. CULCH. (_to_ MISS T.). I should like to be at Nuremberg with you. It would be an unspeakable delight to watch the expansion of a fresh young soul in that rich mediaeval atmosphere! MISS T. I guess you'll have opportunities of watching Mr. Podbury's fresh young soul under those conditions, any way. CULCH. It would not be at all the same thing--even if he--but you _do_ think you're coming to Nuremberg, don't you? MISS T. Well, it's this way. Poppa don't want to get fooling around any more one-horse towns than he can help, and he's got to be fixed up with the idea that Nuremberg is a prominent European sight before he drops everything to get there. CULCH. I will undertake to interest him in Nuremberg. Fortunately, we are all getting off at Bingen, and going, curiously enough, to the same hotel. (_To himself._) Confound that fellow Podbury, here he is _again_! PODB. (_to himself, as he advances_). If she's carrying on with that fellow, Culchard, to provoke me, I'll soon show her how little I--(_Aloud._) I say, old man, hope I'm not interrupting you, but I just want to speak to you for a minute, if Miss Trotter will excuse us. Is there any particular point in going as far as Bingen to-night, eh? CULCH. (_resignedly_). As much as there is in not going farther than somewhere else, _I_ should have thought. PODB. Well, but look here--why not stop at Bacharach, and see what sort of a place it is? CULCH. You forget that our time is limited if we're going to stick to our original route. PODB. Yes, of course; mustn't waste any on the Rhine. Suppose we push on to Maintz to-night, and get the Rhine off our hands then? (_With a glance at_ MISS TROTTER.) The sooner I've done with this steamer business the better! MISS T. Well, Mr. Podbury, that's not a vurry complimentary remark to make before me! PODB. We've seen so little of one another lately that it can hardly make much difference--to _either_ of us--can it? MISS T. Now I call that real kind, you're consoling me in advance! THE STEWARD (_coming up_). De dickets dat I haf nod yed seen! (_examining_ CULCHARD'S _coupons_). For Bingen--so? CULCH. _I_ am. This gentleman gets off--is it Bacharach or Maintz, Podbury?