Women -- Suffrage -- Great Britain -- Fiction; World War, 1914-1918 -- Great Britain -- Fiction
But Anthony was mistaken when he thought that the pressure of these
antagonisms would move Michael an inch from the way he meant to go.
Rather, it drew out that resistance which Michael's mind had always
offered to the loathsome violences of the collective soul. From his very
first encounters with the collective soul and its emotions they had
seemed to Michael as dangerous as they were loathsome. Collective
emotion might be on the side of the archangels or on the side of devils
and of swine; its mass was what made it dangerous, a thing that
challenged the resistance of the private soul But in his worst dreams of
what it could do to him Michael had never imagined anything more
appalling than the collective patriotism of the British and their
Allies, this rushing together of the souls of four countries to make one
monstrous soul.
And neither Anthony nor Frances realized that Michael, at this moment,
was afraid, not of the War so much as of the emotions of the War, the
awful, terrifying flood that carried him away from his real self and
from everything it cared for most. Patriotism was, no doubt, a fine
emotion; but the finer the thing was, the more it got you; it got you
and you were done for. He was determined that it shouldn't get him. They
couldn't see--and that was Michael's grievance--that his resistance was
his strength and not his weakness.
Even Frances, who believed that people never changed, did not realize
that the grown-up Michael who didn't want to enlist was the same entity
as the little Michael who hadn't wanted to go to the party, who had
wanted to go on playing with himself, afraid of nothing so much as of
forgetting "pieces of himself that he wanted to remember." He was
Michael who refused to stay at school another term, and who talked about
shooting himself because he had to go with his class and do what the
other fellows were doing. He objected to being suddenly required to feel
patriotic because other people were feeling patriotic, to think that
Germany was in the wrong because other people thought that Germany was
in the wrong, to fight because other people were fighting.
Why should he? He saw no earthly reason why.
He said to himself that it was the blasted cheek of the assumption that
he resented. There was a peculiarly British hypocrisy and unfairness and
tyranny about it all.
It wasn't--as they all seemed to think--that he was afraid to fight. He
had wanted to go and fight for Ireland. He would fight any day in a
cleaner cause. By a cleaner cause Michael meant a cause that had not
been messed about so much by other people. Other people had not put
pressure on him to fight for Ireland; in fact they had tried to stop
him. Michael was also aware that in the matter of Ireland his emotions,
though shared by considerable numbers of the Irish people, were not
shared by his family or by many people whom he knew; to all intents and
purposes he had them to himself.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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