Children -- Fiction; England -- Fiction; Ghost stories; Governesses -- Fiction; Psychological fiction
He turned round to the fire, gave a kick to a log, watched it an
instant. Then as he faced us again: “I can’t begin. I shall have to
send to town.” There was a unanimous groan at this, and much reproach;
after which, in his preoccupied way, he explained. “The story’s
written. It’s in a locked drawer—it has not been out for years. I could
write to my man and enclose the key; he could send down the packet as
he finds it.” It was to me in particular that he appeared to propound
this—appeared almost to appeal for aid not to hesitate. He had broken a
thickness of ice, the formation of many a winter; had had his reasons
for a long silence. The others resented postponement, but it was just
his scruples that charmed me. I adjured him to write by the first post
and to agree with us for an early hearing; then I asked him if the
experience in question had been his own. To this his answer was prompt.
“Oh, thank God, no!”
“And is the record yours? You took the thing down?”
“Nothing but the impression. I took that _here_”—he tapped his heart.
“I’ve never lost it.”
“Then your manuscript—?”
“Is in old, faded ink, and in the most beautiful hand.” He hung fire
again. “A woman’s. She has been dead these twenty years. She sent me
the pages in question before she died.” They were all listening now,
and of course there was somebody to be arch, or at any rate to draw the
inference. But if he put the inference by without a smile it was also
without irritation. “She was a most charming person, but she was ten
years older than I. She was my sister’s governess,” he quietly said.
“She was the most agreeable woman I’ve ever known in her position; she
would have been worthy of any whatever. It was long ago, and this
episode was long before. I was at Trinity, and I found her at home on
my coming down the second summer. I was much there that year—it was a
beautiful one; and we had, in her off-hours, some strolls and talks in
the garden—talks in which she struck me as awfully clever and nice. Oh
yes; don’t grin: I liked her extremely and am glad to this day to think
she liked me, too. If she hadn’t she wouldn’t have told me. She had
never told anyone. It wasn’t simply that she said so, but that I knew
she hadn’t. I was sure; I could see. You’ll easily judge why when you
hear.”
“Because the thing had been such a scare?”
He continued to fix me. “You’ll easily judge,” he repeated: “_you_
will.”
I fixed him, too. “I see. She was in love.”
He laughed for the first time. “You _are_ acute. Yes, she was in love.
That is, she had been. That came out—she couldn’t tell her story
without its coming out. I saw it, and she saw I saw it; but neither of
us spoke of it. I remember the time and the place—the corner of the
lawn, the shade of the great beeches and the long, hot summer
afternoon. It wasn’t a scene for a shudder; but oh—!” He quitted the
fire and dropped back into his chair.
“You’ll receive the packet Thursday morning?” I inquired.
“Probably not till the second post.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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