Children -- Fiction; England -- Fiction; Ghost stories; Governesses -- Fiction; Psychological fiction
He was the same—he was
the same, and seen, this time, as he had been seen before, from the
waist up, the window, though the dining room was on the ground floor,
not going down to the terrace on which he stood. His face was close to
the glass, yet the effect of this better view was, strangely, only to
show me how intense the former had been. He remained but a few
seconds—long enough to convince me he also saw and recognized; but it
was as if I had been looking at him for years and had known him always.
Something, however, happened this time that had not happened before;
his stare into my face, through the glass and across the room, was as
deep and hard as then, but it quitted me for a moment during which I
could still watch it, see it fix successively several other things. On
the spot there came to me the added shock of a certitude that it was
not for me he had come there. He had come for someone else.
The flash of this knowledge—for it was knowledge in the midst of
dread—produced in me the most extraordinary effect, started as I stood
there, a sudden vibration of duty and courage. I say courage because I
was beyond all doubt already far gone. I bounded straight out of the
door again, reached that of the house, got, in an instant, upon the
drive, and, passing along the terrace as fast as I could rush, turned a
corner and came full in sight. But it was in sight of nothing now—my
visitor had vanished. I stopped, I almost dropped, with the real relief
of this; but I took in the whole scene—I gave him time to reappear. I
call it time, but how long was it? I can’t speak to the purpose today
of the duration of these things. That kind of measure must have left
me: they couldn’t have lasted as they actually appeared to me to last.
The terrace and the whole place, the lawn and the garden beyond it, all
I could see of the park, were empty with a great emptiness. There were
shrubberies and big trees, but I remember the clear assurance I felt
that none of them concealed him. He was there or was not there: not
there if I didn’t see him. I got hold of this; then, instinctively,
instead of returning as I had come, went to the window. It was
confusedly present to me that I ought to place myself where he had
stood. I did so; I applied my face to the pane and looked, as he had
looked, into the room. As if, at this moment, to show me exactly what
his range had been, Mrs. Grose, as I had done for himself just before,
came in from the hall. With this I had the full image of a repetition
of what had already occurred. She saw me as I had seen my own visitant;
she pulled up short as I had done; I gave her something of the shock
that I had received. She turned white, and this made me ask myself if I
had blanched as much. She stared, in short, and retreated on just _my_
lines, and I knew she had then passed out and come round to me and that
I should presently meet her. I remained where I was, and while I waited
I thought of more things than one.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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