The Two Magics: The Turn of the Screw, Covering EndJames, Henry
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The Two Magics: The Turn of the Screw, Covering End
James, Henry
Children -- Fiction; Country homes -- Fiction; Courtship -- Fiction; England -- Fiction; Governesses -- Fiction; Mortgages -- Fiction
I scarce know how to put my story into words that shall be a credible
picture of my state of mind; but I was in these days literally able to
find a joy in the extraordinary flight of heroism the occasion demanded
of me. I now saw that I had been asked for a service admirable and
difficult; and there would be a greatness in letting it be seen--oh,
in the right quarter!--that I could succeed where many another girl
might have failed. It was an immense help to me--I confess I rather
applaud myself as I look back!--that I saw my service so strongly and
so simply. I was there to protect and defend the little creatures in
the world the most bereaved and the most loveable, the appeal of whose
helplessness had suddenly become only too explicit, a deep, constant
ache of one’s own committed heart. We were cut off, really, together;
we were united in our danger. They had nothing but me, and I--well, I
had _them_. It was in short a magnificent chance. This chance presented
itself to me in an image richly material. I was a screen--I was to
stand before them. The more I saw, the less they would. I began
to watch them in a stifled suspense, a disguised excitement that
might well, had it continued too long, have turned to something like
madness. What saved me, as I now see, was that it turned to something
else altogether. It didn’t last as suspense--it was superseded by
horrible proofs. Proofs, I say, yes--from the moment I really took
hold.
This moment dated from an afternoon hour that I happened to spend in
the grounds with the younger of my pupils alone. We had left Miles
indoors, on the red cushion of a deep window-seat; he had wished to
finish a book, and I had been glad to encourage a purpose so laudable
in a young man whose only defect was an occasional excess of the
restless. His sister, on the contrary, had been alert to come out,
and I strolled with her half an hour, seeking the shade, for the sun
was still high and the day exceptionally warm. I was aware afresh, with
her, as we went, of how, like her brother, she contrived--it was the
charming thing in both children--to let me alone without appearing to
drop me and to accompany me without appearing to surround. They were
never importunate and yet never listless. My attention to them all
really went to seeing them amuse themselves immensely without me: this
was a spectacle they seemed actively to prepare and that engaged me as
an active admirer. I walked in a world of their invention--they had no
occasion whatever to draw upon mine; so that my time was taken only
with being, for them, some remarkable person or thing that the game
of the moment required and that was merely, thanks to my superior, my
exalted stamp, a happy and highly distinguished sinecure. I forget what
I was on the present occasion; I only remember that I was something
very important and very quiet and that Flora was playing very hard. We
were on the edge of the lake, and, as we had lately begun geography,
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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