"Yes, whenever it's possible."
"It's possible, now, dearest, and perhaps it won't be later. You could
visit some friend for a few weeks and come back the better able to carry
on the siege. Otherwise you'll be crushed by the weight of the ordeal."
"Stuart," she began slowly, "who is there to take my place, even for a
few weeks?"
"And the whole intolerable situation arises," he broke out with a
sudden inflection of wrath, "from inert, thick-skulled bigotry. Thought
processes that are moral cramps and mental dyspepsia threaten to ruin
your entire life."
"Don't, dear--please!" She leaned toward him and spoke earnestly. "I
know it's hard to endure without retort, but please don't make me listen
to things like that about Father. It's bad enough without any more
recriminations."
Then logic retreated from Stuart Farquaharson. He, the gracious and
controlled, gave way to his first moment of ungenerous temper and
retorted bitterly.
"Very well, but it seems you can listen to his abuse of me."
Conscience flinched as if lash-stung and for an instant indignation and
anger kindled in her eyes only to die as instantly out of them, as she
bit her lip. When she spoke it was in an even gentler voice. "You know
why I listened to him, Stuart. You know that I didn't listen ... before
his stroke. I didn't listen when I told him that if you went, I went,
too, did I?"
The man's face paled and with a spasmodic gesture he covered it with his
hands. "My God!" he exclaimed, "I don't think I've ever said such a
damnably mean and caddish thing before--and to you!"
But Conscience bent over and drew his hands away from his face. "It
wasn't you. It was just the strain. You could make allowances for me
when I called you out to calm me in the middle of the night. I can make
them, too. Neither of us is quite sane."
But having had that warning of Stuart's slipping control, Conscience
kept locked in her own bosom certain fresh trials which discussion would
have alleviated. She did not tell him how she spent sleepless nights
devising plans to meet the grim insistence upon his banishment which
she knew the morning would bring. But she felt that the comfort of a
complete unburdening of her feelings had been curtailed and with a
woman's genius for sacrifice she uncomplainingly assumed that added
strain.
One afternoon Eben Tollman came out of the house, as she was walking
alone under the bare trees of the driveway, and stopped, hat in hand, at
her side.
"Conscience," he began thoughtfully, "Mr. Williams has just told me of
his insistence that Mr. Farquaharson shall not only be denied the house,
but sent away altogether. You must be carrying a pretty heavy load for
young shoulders."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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