England -- Social life and customs -- 19th century -- Fiction; English fiction -- 19th century
That was not quite ten years gone by; she was then but eighteen. Let
her have lost her child, and she would speedily have fallen into the
last stages of degradation. But the little one lived. She had called it
Ida, a name chosen from some tale in the penny weeklies, which were the
solace of her misery. She herself took the name of Starr, also from a
page of fiction.
Balancing the good and evil of this life in her dark little mind, Lotty
determined that one thing there was for which it was worth while to
make sacrifices, one end which she felt strong enough to keep
persistently in view. Ida should be brought up "respectably"--it was
her own word; she should be kept absolutely free from the contamination
of her mother's way of living; nay, should, when the time came, go to
school, and have good chances. And at the end of all this was a far-off
hope, a dim vision of possibilities, a vague trust that her daughter
might perchance prove for her a means of returning to that world of
"respectability" from which she was at present so hopelessly shut out.
She would keep making efforts to get into an honest livelihood as often
as an occasion presented itself; and Ida should always live with
"respectable" people, cost what it might.
The last resolution was only adhered to for a few months. Lotty could
not do without her little one, and eventually brought it back to her
own home. It is not an infrequent thing to find little children living
in disorderly houses. In the profession Lotty had chosen there are, as
in all professions, grades and differences. She was by no means a
vicious girl, she had no love of riot for its own sake; she would
greatly have preferred a decent mode of life, had it seemed
practicable. Hence she did not associate herself with the rank and file
of abandoned women; her resorts were not the crowded centres; her abode
was not in the quarters consecrated to her business. In all parts of
London there are quiet by-streets of houses given up to
lodging-letting, wherein are to be found many landladies, who, good
easy souls, trouble little about the private morals of their lodgers,
so long as no positive disorder comes about and no public scandal is
occasioned. A girl who says that she is occupied in a workroom is never
presumed to be able to afford the luxury of strict virtue, and if such
a one, on taking a room, says that "she supposes she may have friends
come to see her?" the landlady will understand quite well what is
meant, and will either accept or refuse her for a lodger as she sees
good. To such houses as these Lotty confined herself. After some three
or four years of various experiences, she hit upon the abode in Milton
Street, and there had dwelt ever since. She got on well with Mrs.
Ledward, and had been able to make comfortable arrangements for Ida.
The other lodgers in the house were generally very quiet and orderly
people, and she herself was quite successful in arranging her affairs
so as to create no disturbance.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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