Meantime, the year wore away. Christmas vacation happened. Quincy
experienced a radiant New Year. For naught took place. His projection of
dream had the æther to itself. There were no obstructions great enough
to make him conscious that he was gliding--that the avalanche had subtly
started. His mother had been ill and was South during the holidays. This
may have saved him. But howsoever, the New Year came radiant upon its
tracks of ice.
* * * * *
With January, there was an afternoon that revealed many things already
long alive.
It was the first “tea” with Julia Deering since the last May. In
Quincy’s still confident state this fact required no comment beyond the
probability that she had had no inclination or no time for him, alone.
Her previous favors in this light called neither for sequel nor for
conclusion. He went that afternoon then, splendidly at ease, eager by
anticipation to show his friend how full and serious a man he was. He
knew he must impress her. And in that impress, she would see the
handwork of her husband. This must delight a devoted spouse.
Quincy did not recall, even, as he rang the bell, how he had come that
first time, a year since. His grip on memory was of rare efficiency.
This grip it was, forsooth, that made the delusion possible of his grip
on life. There was no happy mean in Quincy’s nature. He had suffered
through too wide a surface of fine feeling. His memory had been too keen
to suggest ways in which the present and the future might attack him.
Too great had been his liking to an exposed nerve. And now, there was no
surface at all for life to sting, no memory at all for life to grope by,
no meeting on life’s plane. He was beyond the rule of the realities. He
was a boy, nursing his spirit. And no more unreal being can be found in
the vast Mirage called Truth.
As he came, then, that day, to chat and perhaps clumsily gulp down his
tea, a subtle streak fenced off the real Quincy from the conscious one.
These two mingled their accents. To the thoughts of the one, the other
expressed speech; to the feelings of the other, the first gave
utterance. And at times, the lips and the hearts of each made
instantaneous counterpoint. The harmony of all this was minor. A mere
thread of vibrance often drew the line between them. And in such faint
distinctions, voiced at once, lies discord. Music, builded upon this
searching wisdom, Quincy had not failed to love, that night at the
Deering party. The subtle barriers of its sound, thrown together into a
stirring discord, had gone forth and understood him. Julia had not loved
the music. But here, played on this gentler instrument, the same, weird,
lingering detonations gripped and swayed her. At last, in his gestures
and his words and the flash of his eyes, the Modern Music was articulate
enough for her to hear.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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