The kindness of the man, his laboriousness, his fierce indignation
against moral evil, to say nothing of his extraordinary mental powers,
seem to have been clogged all through life by this sad
self-consciousness. The pity and the mystery of it is that a man should
have been so moulded to help his generation, and then that this
grievous defect of temperament should have been allowed to take its
place as the tyrant of the whole nature. And what makes the whole
situation even more tragic is that it was through a certain
transparency of nature that this egotism became apparent to others. He
was a man who seemed bound to speak of all that was in his mind; that
was a part of his rhetorical temperament. But if he could have held his
tongue, if he could have kept his own weakness of spirit concealed, he
might have achieved the very successes which he desired, and, indeed,
deserved. The result is that a richly endowed character achieves no
conspicuous greatness, either as a teacher, a speaker, a writer, or
even as a man.
The moral of these two books is this: How can any one whose character
is deeply tinged by this sort of egotism--and it is the shadow of all
eager and sensitive temperaments--best fight against it? Can it be
subdued, can it be concealed, can it be cured? I hardly dare to think
so. But I think that a man may deliberately resolve not to make
recognition an object; and next I believe he may most successfully
fight against egotism in ordinary life by regarding it mainly as a
question of manners. If a man can only, in early life, get into his
head that it is essentially bad manners to thrust himself forward, and
determine rather to encourage others to speak out what is in their
minds, a habit can be acquired; and probably, upon acquaintance, an
interest in the point of view of others will grow. That is not a very
lofty solution, but I believe it to be a practical one; and certainly
for a man of egotistic nature it is a severe and fruitful lesson to
read the lives of two such self-absorbed characters as Spencer and
Farrar, and to see, in the one case, how ugly and distorting a fault,
in the other, how hampering a burden it may become.
Egotism is really a failure of sympathy, a failure of justice, a
failure of proportion, and to recognise this is the first step towards
establishing a desire to be loving, just, and well-balanced.
But still the mystery remains: and I think that perhaps the most
wholesome attitude is to be grateful for what in the way of work, of
precept, of example these men achieved, and to leave the mystery of
their faults to their Maker, in the noble spirit of Gray's Elegy:--
"No farther seek his merits to disclose,
Or draw his frailties from their dread abode
(There they alike in trembling hope repose),
The bosom of his Father and his God."
--Ever yours,
T. B.
MONK'S ORCHARD,
UPTON,
Nov. 8, 1904.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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