The Vatican swindle : $b (Les caves du Vatican)Gide, André
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The Vatican swindle : $b (Les caves du Vatican)
Gide, André
Detective and mystery stories; French fiction -- Translations into English
Being of a nervous and theoretical disposition, his ideas about bugs,
like many other people’s, were all wrong; cold with disgust, he began by
searching for them on himself--found ne’er a one--thought he had made a
mistake--again believed that he must be falling ill. There was nothing
on his sheets either; but nevertheless, before getting into bed again,
it occurred to him to lift up his bolster. He then saw three tiny
blackish pastilles, which tucked themselves nimbly away into a fold of
the sheet. It was they, sure enough!
Setting his candle on the bed, he tracked them down, opened out the fold
and discovered five of them. Not daring to squash them with his
finger-nail, he flung them in disgust into his chamber-pot and watered
them copiously. He watched them struggling for a few moments--pleased
and ferocious. It soothed his feelings. Then he got back into bed and
blew out his candle.
The bites began again almost immediately with redoubled violence. There
were new ones now on the back of his neck. He lighted his candle once
more in a rage and took his night-shirt right off this time so as to
examine the collar at his leisure. At last he perceived four or five
minute light red specks running along the edge of the seam; he crushed
them on the linen, where they left a stain of blood--horrid little
creatures, so tiny that he could hardly believe that they were bugs
already; but a little later, on raising his bolster again, he unearthed
an enormous one--their mother for certain; at that, encouraged, excited,
amused almost, he took off the bolster, undid the sheets and began a
methodical search. He fancied now that he saw them everywhere, but as a
matter of fact caught only four; he went back to bed and enjoyed an
hour’s peace.
Then the burning and itching began again. Once more he started the hunt;
then, worn out at last with disgust and fatigue, gave it up, and noticed
that if he did not scratch, the itching subsided pretty quickly. At dawn
the last of the creatures, presumably gorged, let him be. He was
sleeping heavily when the waiter called him in time for his train.
* * * * *
At Toulon it was fleas.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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