The Vatican swindle : $b (Les caves du Vatican)Gide, André
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The Vatican swindle : $b (Les caves du Vatican)
Gide, André
Detective and mystery stories; French fiction -- Translations into English
Truly, a skilful fellow, this barber! After soaping Amédée’s chin, he
cautiously pushed aside the lather with a corner of his towel and
brought to light the fiery pimple, which his nervous client pointed out
to him. Oh, somnolence! Oh, warmth and drowsiness of the quiet little
shop! Amédée, half lying in the leather arm-chair, with his head leaning
comfortably back, let himself drift. Ah! just for one short moment to
forget! To think no more of the Pope and the mosquitoes and Carola! To
imagine himself back to Pau with Arnica; to imagine himself
somewhere--anywhere else--no longer to know where he was!... He shut his
eyes, then half opening them, saw as in a dream on the wall opposite
him, a woman with streaming hair issuing out of the Bay of Naples, and
bringing up from the watery depths, together with a voluptuous sensation
of coolness, a glittering bottle of hair-restorer. Above this
advertisement were arranged, on a marble slab, more bottles, a stick of
cosmetic and a powder puff, a pair of tweezers, a comb, a lancet, a pot
of ointment, a glass jar in which a few leeches were indolently
floating, a second glass jar which contained the long ribbon of a
tapeworm and lately a third jar which was without a lid, half full of
some gelatinous substance, and had pasted on its crystalline surface a
label, inscribed by hand, in large fancy capitals, with the word
ANTISEPTIC.
The barber now, in order to bring his work to perfection, spread afresh
an unctuous lather over the already shaven chin, and with the gleaming
edge of a second rasor, which he sharpened on the palm of his damp hand,
he set about his final polishing. Amédée thought no more of his
appointment, thought no more of leaving, began to doze off.... It was
just at this moment that there came into the shop a loud-voiced
Sicilian, rending the peacefulness with his clatter; it was then that
the barber, plunging at once into talk, began to shave with a less
attentive hand, and with a sudden sweep of his blade--pop! the pimple
was beheaded!
Amédée gave a cry and was putting his hand to the cut, from which a drop
of blood came oozing:
“_Niente! Niente!_” said the barber, holding back his arm; then, taking
a piece of discoloured cotton-wool from the back of the drawer, he
lavishly dipped it into the ANTISEPTIC and applied it to the place.
Without caring now whether the passers-by turned to look at him, Amédée
fled down the hill towards the town--where else but to the first
druggist’s he could find?
He showed his hurt to the man of healing--a mouldy, greenish,
unhealthy-looking old fellow, who smiled and, taking a little round of
sticking-plaster out of a box, passed his broad tongue over it and....
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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