The Vatican swindle : $b (Les caves du Vatican)Gide, André
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The Vatican swindle : $b (Les caves du Vatican)
Gide, André
Detective and mystery stories; French fiction -- Translations into English
Flinging out of the shop, Fleurissoire spat with disgust, tore off the
slimy plaster and, pressing his pimple between two fingers, made it
bleed as much as he could. Then, having wetted his handkerchief with
saliva--his own this time--he rubbed the place. Then, looking at his
watch, he was seized with panic, rushed up the street at a run, and
arrived in front of the Cardinal’s door, perspiring, panting, bleeding,
red in the face, and a quarter of an hour late.
VI
Protos welcomed him with a finger on his lips.
“As long as the servants are there, nothing must be said to arouse
suspicion. They all speak French. Not a word--not a sign to betray us!
Don’t go plastering him with ‘Cardinals,’ whatever you do. Your host is
Ciro Bardolotti, the chaplain. As for me, I’m not ‘Father Cave’ but
plain Cave. Understand?” And abruptly changing his tone and smacking him
on the shoulder, he explained in a loud voice: “Here he is, by Jove!
It’s Amédée! Well, old man, you’ve been a fine time over your shave! In
another moment or two, per _Baccho_, we should have sat down without
you. The turkey that turneth on the spit beginneth to glow like the
setting sun!” Then, in a whisper: “Ah, my dear sir, how painful it is to
play a part! My heart is wrung....” Then in a loud voice: “What do I
see? A cut? Thou bleedest, my lad. Run, Dorino, to the barn and fetch a
cobweb--a sovereign remedy for wounds....”
Thus clowning it, he pushed Fleurissoire across the lobby, towards a
terrace garden, where a table lay spread under a trellis of vine.
“My dear Bardolotti, allow me to introduce my cousin, Monsieur de la
Fleurissoire. He’s a devil of a fellow, as I told you.”
“I bid you welcome, sir guest,” said Bardolotti with a flourish, but
without rising from the arm-chair in which he was sitting; then,
pointing to his bare feet, which were plunged in a tub of clear water:
“These pedal ablutions improve my appetite and draw the blood from my
head.”
He was a funny little roundabout man, whose smooth face gave no
indication of age or sex. He was dressed in alpaca; there was nothing
about him to denote a high dignitary; one would have had to be
exceedingly perspicacious, or else in the secret--like Fleurissoire--to
have discovered a discreet touch of cardinalesque unction beneath the
joviality of his manners. He was leaning sideways on the table, fanning
himself languidly with a kind of cocked hat made out of a sheet of
newspaper.
“Er ... er ... highly flattered ... er ... er ... what a charming
garden!” stuttered Fleurissoire, finding speech and silence equally
embarrassing.
“Soaked enough!” cried the Cardinal. “Hullo, someone! Take away this
tub! Assunta!”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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