DORIS [_infuriated_]. That’s _just_ the sort of thing I was talking about! Going to sleep like that when a person’s trying to tell you something for your own son’s good. That’s just _exactly_ what I mean! DADA [_puzzled but resentful_]. I don’t like you. You’re a very forward young girl. Your parents brought you up very unsuccessfully indeed. DORIS [_smugly_]. All right. You’re just making me think so more than ever. Go right ahead. Don’t mind me. Go right ahead. Then when you begin to really _rave_ I’ll send for the lunatic-asylum wagon. DADA [_with an air of cold formality_]. I’ll ask you to excuse me. [_He wants to get to sleep._] DORIS. First thing you know you’ll take all the money in the Treasury and hide it and forget where you put it. DADA [_succinctly_]. There isn’t any money in the Treasury. DORIS [_after a stunned pause_]. Just what do you mean by that statement? DADA [_drowsily_]. There isn’t any money in the Treasury. There was seven thousand dollars left yesterday, but I worked from morning till night and now there isn’t one red penny in there. DORIS. You must be crazy. DADA. [_He can scarcely keep awake._] Hm. DORIS. Look at here! What do you mean--have you been spending that money--that doesn’t belong to you, you know--on some fast woman? DADA [_as usual, he doesn’t quite hear_]. Yes, it’s all gone. I went down yesterday morning and I said to myself: “Horatio, you got only seven thousand dollars left, and you got to work from morning till night and get rid of it.” And I did. DORIS [_furious, but impressed at the magnitude of the crime_]. How much was there altogether? DADA. Altogether? I haven’t the figures with me. DORIS. Why, you old dumb-bell, you. Imagine an old man your age that hasn’t had anything to do for twenty years but just sit around and _think_, going crazy about a woman at your age! [_With scornful pity._] Don’t you know she just made a fool of you? DADA [_shaking his finger at her_]. You must not talk like that. Be courteous and---- DORIS. Yes, and pretty soon some woman comes along and you get “courteous” with her to the extent of all the money in the Treasury. DADA. Yes, that’s one thing that stood me in good stead. My mother used to say to me: “Horatio----” DORIS [_paying no attention to him_]. What was her name? DADA. Her name was Roxanna. DORIS. Where did she get hold of you? DADA. My mother? DORIS. Your paramour. DADA. She used to say to me: “Horatio----” DORIS. She probably used to say a lot more than that! Oh, I know how they handle old men like you. I’ve seen a lot of that. Slush is what appeals to old men like you. DADA. No--I said courtesy. DORIS. You mean slush. What did she call you?--her old toodledums? And all that sort of thing? How perfectly disgusting! _Out comes Jerry now, just in time to catch Dada’s next remark, and to realize that there’s persecution in the air._