Now it is impossible for a woman who is perpetually at war with herself
and living in contradiction to her true life, to leave others in peace
or refrain from envying their happiness. The whole range of these sad
truths could be read in the dulled gray eyes of Mademoiselle Gamard; the
dark circles that surrounded those eyes told of the inward conflicts of
her solitary life. All the wrinkles on her face were in straight lines.
The structure of her forehead and cheeks was rigid and prominent. She
allowed, with apparent indifference, certain scattered hairs, once
brown, to grow upon her chin. Her thin lips scarcely covered teeth that
were too long, though still quite white. Her complexion was dark, and
her hair, originally black, had turned gray from frightful headaches,--a
misfortune which obliged her to wear a false front. Not knowing how to
put it on so as to conceal the junction between the real and the false,
there were often little gaps between the border of her cap and the black
string with which this semi-wig (always badly curled) was fastened to
her head. Her gown, silk in summer, merino in winter, and always brown
in color, was invariably rather tight for her angular figure and thin
arms. Her collar, limp and bent, exposed too much the red skin of a
neck which was ribbed like an oak-leaf in winter seen in the light. Her
origin explains to some extent the defects of her conformation. She
was the daughter of a wood-merchant, a peasant, who had risen from the
ranks. She might have been plump at eighteen, but no trace remained of
the fair complexion and pretty color of which she was wont to boast.
The tones of her flesh had taken the pallid tints so often seen in
“devotes.” Her aquiline nose was the feature that chiefly proclaimed
the despotism of her nature, and the flat shape of her forehead the
narrowness of her mind. Her movements had an odd abruptness which
precluded all grace; the mere motion with which she twitched her
handkerchief from her bag and blew her nose with a loud noise would have
shown her character and habits to a keen observer. Being rather tall,
she held herself very erect, and justified the remark of a naturalist
who once explained the peculiar gait of old maids by declaring that
their joints were consolidating. When she walked her movements were not
equally distributed over her whole person, as they are in other women,
producing those graceful undulations which are so attractive. She moved,
so to speak, in a single block, seeming to advance at each step like the
statue of the Commendatore. When she felt in good humour she was apt,
like other old maids, to tell of the chances she had had to marry,
and of her fortunate discovery in time of the want of means of her
lovers,--proving, unconsciously, that her worldly judgment was better
than her heart.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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