Diary fiction; English fiction -- 20th century; Love stories; Young women -- Fiction
“Nothing,” I said, as well as I could, and tried to tilt my hat over my
eyes. I had no veil on unfortunately.
“I have just been for a walk. Why do you call me Evangeline, and why
are you not in Northumberland?”
He looked so tall and beautiful, and his face had no expression of
contempt or anger now, only distress and sympathy.
“I was suddenly put on guard yesterday, and could not get leave,” he
said, not answering the first part. “But, oh, I can’t bear to see you
sitting here alone, and looking so, so miserable. Mayn’t I take you
home? You will catch cold in the damp.”
“Oh no, not yet. I won’t go back yet!” I said, hardly realizing what
I was saying. He sat down beside me, and slipped his hand into my
muff, pressing my clasped fingers--the gentlest, friendliest caress,
a child might have made in sympathy. It touched some foolish chord in
my nature, some want of self-control inherited from mamma’s ordinary
mother, I suppose, anyway the tears poured down my face--I could not
help it. Oh, the shame of it! to sit crying in the Park, in front of
Lord Robert, of all people in the world, too!
“Dear, dear little girl,” he said. “Tell me about it,” and he held my
hand in my muff with his strong warm hand.
“I--I have nothing to tell,” I said, choking down a sob. “I am ashamed
for you to see me like this, only--I am feeling so very miserable.”
“Dear child,” he said. “Well, you are not to be--I won’t have it. Has
some one been unkind to you--tell me, tell me,” his voice was trembling
with distress.
“It’s--it’s nothing,” I mumbled.
I dared not look at him, I knew his eyebrows would be up in that way
that attracts me so dreadfully.
“Listen,” he whispered almost, and bent over me. “I want you to be
friends with me so that I can help you. I want you to go back to the
time we packed your books together. God knows what has come between
us since--it is not of my doing--but I want to take care of you, dear
little girl to-day. It--oh, it hurts me so to see you crying here.”
“I--would like to be friends,” I said. “I never wanted to be anything
else, but I could not help it--and I can’t now.”
“Won’t you tell me the reason?” he pleaded. “You have made me so
dreadfully unhappy about it. I thought all sorts of things. You know I
am a jealous beast.”
There can’t in the world be another voice as engaging as Lord Robert’s,
and he has a trick of pronouncing words that is too attractive, and
the way his mouth goes when he is speaking, showing his perfectly
chiselled lips under the little moustache! There is no use pretending!
I was sitting there on the bench going through thrills of emotion, and
longing for him to take me in his arms. It is too frightful to think
of! I must be bad after all.
“Now you are going to tell me everything about it,” he commanded. “To
begin with, what made you suddenly change at Tryland after the first
afternoon, and then what is it that makes you so unhappy now?”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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