England -- Fiction; Interpersonal relations -- Fiction
Hermione was not rude to John, and she was tenderness itself to Elise,
but slowly, with graceful and increasing tenacity, she began to put
pressure on Elise. There was no open strife between her and her
brother-in-law, but at the end of a fortnight John had said “Damn” to
Elise. He had not meant to say it, but the previous evening had been an
exceedingly trying one, and John had been more polite than his nature
could sustain. The evening had culminated in John’s trying to save the
broken remnants of his remarkably good temper by starting an impersonal
topic.
“I shall have the lawn mowed to-morrow,” he observed as pleasantly as he
could manage, and Hermione replied,
“What a pity to cut off the dear little daisies’ heads!”
Elise said, “Yes, _must_ it be mown, John?” and John had explained
briefly, with an unfortunate edge to his voice, that English lawns were
wholly incompatible with the heads of daisies. The subject a little
abruptly withered, and if Elise had been married longer she would have
known that subjects which abruptly wither need very careful handling if
they are to be revived in any satisfactory manner.
Elise came into John’s dressing room while he was shaving, and announced
quite cheerfully that the lawn mustn’t be mown to-day on any account,
because Hermione had a terrible headache and couldn’t bear the sound of
a mowing machine under her window.
John said “Damn” with his face all over lather, which made it sound
fiercer, and Elise exclaimed,
“Why, John, I think you’re real mean!”
Then they looked at each other aghast.
Elise wore her blue silk dressing gown and a lace cap covered with pink
rosebuds. A fortnight ago John had told her that when she wore it he
felt that he was entertaining the Madonna.
It was obvious that he was unprepared to give Elise a suitable
entertainment in this character at present.
Elise retreated into her bedroom, and John continued shaving. He did not
countermand the mowing machine.
It began ten minutes later and went on for a quarter of an hour. Every
minute of that time John and Elise heard the lawn-mower, as if they had
been the heads of the daisies expecting immediate execution.
Hermione heard it too, but she knew that she was not going on hearing
it. She had never been in the position of a threatened daisy.
In a quarter of an hour John told the gardener to stop. The gardener
pointed out that it would look rather queer, as he had only just had
time to make a stripe across the lawn.
John used language which he could only have heard from a Cavalry General
confronted by an ill-cooked meal, and retreated into the shrubbery. The
gardener said, “My word! The new master has a tongue!” and went into the
kitchen to tell the cook, trusting on the strength of his recital to be
given a glass of cider.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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