Clergy -- Fiction; France -- Social life and customs -- 19th century -- Fiction; French fiction -- Translations into English
After these words, said with pastoral unction and dignity, the
archbishop turned aside to give place to Veronique. The dying woman came
forward, supported by her old mother and the rector,--the mother from
whom she derived her body, the Church, the spiritual mother of her soul.
She knelt down on a cushion, clasped her hands, and seemed to collect
herself for a few moments, as if to gather from some source descending
from heaven the power to speak. At this moment the silence was almost
terrifying. None dared look at their neighbor. All eyes were lowered.
And yet the eyes of Veronique, when she raised them, encountered those
of the _procureur-general_, and the expression on that blanched face
brought the color to hers.
“I could not die in peace,” said Veronique, in a voice of deep emotion,
“if I suffered the false impression you all have of me to remain. You
see in me a guilty woman, who asks your prayers, and who seeks to make
herself worthy of pardon by this public confession of her sin. That sin
was so great, its consequences were so fatal, that perhaps no penance
can atone for it. But the more humiliation I submit to here on earth,
the less I may have to dread the wrath of God in the heavenly kingdom to
which I am going. My father, who had great confidence in me, commended
to my care (now twenty years ago) a son of this parish, in whom he had
seen a great desire to improve himself, an aptitude for study, and fine
characteristics. I mean the unfortunate Jean-Francois Tascheron, who
thenceforth attached himself to me as his benefactress. How did the
affection I felt for him become a guilty one? I think myself excused
from explaining this. Perhaps it could be shown that the purest
sentiments by which we act in this world were insensibly diverted from
their course by untold sacrifices, by reasons arising from our human
frailty, by many causes which might appear to dismiss the evil of my
sin. But even if the noblest affections moved me, was I less guilty?
Rather let me confess that I, who by education, by position in the
world, might consider myself superior to the youth my father confided to
me, and from whom I was separated by the natural delicacy of our sex,--I
listened, fatally, to the promptings of the devil. I soon found myself
too much the mother of that young man to be insensible to his mute and
delicate admiration. He alone, he first, recognized my true value. But
perhaps a horrible calculation entered my mind. I thought how discreet a
youth would be who owed his all to me, and whom the chances of life
had put so far away from me, though we were born equals. I made even my
reputation for benevolence, my pious occupations, a cloak to screen my
conduct. Alas!--and this is doubtless one of my greatest sins--I hid my
passion under cover of the altar. The most virtuous of my actions--the
love I bore my mother, the acts of devotion which were sincere and true
in the midst of my wrong-doing--all, all were made to serve the ends of
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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