MIRA. That’s well. Do you go home again, d’ye hear, and adjourn the
consummation till farther order; bid Waitwell shake his ears, and Dame
Partlet rustle up her feathers, and meet me at one a’ clock by Rosamond’s
pond, that I may see her before she returns to her lady. And, as you
tender your ears, be secret.
SCENE III.
MIRABELL, FAINALL, BETTY.
FAIN. Joy of your success, Mirabell; you look pleased.
MIRA. Ay; I have been engaged in a matter of some sort of mirth, which
is not yet ripe for discovery. I am glad this is not a cabal-night. I
wonder, Fainall, that you who are married, and of consequence should be
discreet, will suffer your wife to be of such a party.
FAIN. Faith, I am not jealous. Besides, most who are engaged are women
and relations; and for the men, they are of a kind too contemptible to
give scandal.
MIRA. I am of another opinion: the greater the coxcomb, always the more
the scandal; for a woman who is not a fool can have but one reason for
associating with a man who is one.
FAIN. Are you jealous as often as you see Witwoud entertained by
Millamant?
MIRA. Of her understanding I am, if not of her person.
FAIN. You do her wrong; for, to give her her due, she has wit.
MIRA. She has beauty enough to make any man think so, and complaisance
enough not to contradict him who shall tell her so.
FAIN. For a passionate lover methinks you are a man somewhat too
discerning in the failings of your mistress.
MIRA. And for a discerning man somewhat too passionate a lover, for I
like her with all her faults; nay, like her for her faults. Her follies
are so natural, or so artful, that they become her, and those
affectations which in another woman would be odious serve but to make her
more agreeable. I’ll tell thee, Fainall, she once used me with that
insolence that in revenge I took her to pieces, sifted her, and separated
her failings: I studied ’em and got ’em by rote. The catalogue was so
large that I was not without hopes, one day or other, to hate her
heartily. To which end I so used myself to think of ’em, that at length,
contrary to my design and expectation, they gave me every hour less and
less disturbance, till in a few days it became habitual to me to remember
’em without being displeased. They are now grown as familiar to me as my
own frailties, and in all probability in a little time longer I shall
like ’em as well.
FAIN. Marry her, marry her; be half as well acquainted with her charms
as you are with her defects, and, my life on’t, you are your own man
again.
MIRA. Say you so?
FAIN. Ay, ay; I have experience. I have a wife, and so forth.
SCENE IV.
[_To them_] MESSENGER.
MESS. Is one Squire Witwoud here?
BET. Yes; what’s your business?
MESS. I have a letter for him, from his brother Sir Wilfull, which I am
charged to deliver into his own hands.
BET. He’s in the next room, friend. That way.
SCENE V.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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