Both these classes are to be pitied, but are not the cause of much
suffering to others. It is annoying, I grant you, to be torn asunder in
a collision, because red and green lights on the switches combined into a
pleasing harmony before the brakeman’s eyes. The tone-deaf gentleman who
insists on whistling a popular melody is almost as trying as the lady
suffering from the same weakness, who shouts, “Ninon, Ninon, que fais-tu
de la vie!” until you feel impelled to cry, ”Que faites-vous, madame,
with the key?”
Examinations now keep daltonic gentlemen out of locomotives, and ladies
who have lost their “keys” are apt to find their friends’ pianos closed.
What we cannot guard against is a variety of the genus _homo_ which
suffers from “social color-blindness.” These well-meaning mortals form
one of the hardest trials that society is heir to; for the disease is
incurable, and as it is almost impossible to escape from them, they
continue to spread dismay and confusion along their path to the bitter
end.
This malady, which, as far as I know, has not been diagnosed, invades all
circles, and is, curiously enough, rampant among well-born and apparently
well-bred people.
Why is it that the entertainments at certain houses are always dull
failures, while across the way one enjoys such agreeable evenings? Both
hosts are gentlemen, enjoying about the same amount of “unearned
increment,” yet the atmosphere of their houses is radically different.
This contrast cannot be traced to the dulness or brilliancy of the
entertainer and his wife. Neither can it be laid at the door of
inexperience, for the worst offenders are often old hands at the game.
The only explanation possible is that the owners of houses where one is
bored are socially color-blind, as cheerfully unconscious of their
weakness as the keyless lady and the whistling abomination.
Since increasing wealth has made entertaining general and lavish, this
malady has become more and more apparent, until one is tempted to parody
Mme. Roland’s dying exclamation and cry, “Hospitality! hospitility! what
crimes are committed in thy name!”
Entertaining is for many people but an excuse for ostentation. For
others it is a means to an end; while a third variety apparently keep a
debit and credit account with their acquaintances—in books of double
entry, so that no errors may occur—and issue invitations like receipts,
only in return for value received.
We can rarely tell what is passing in the minds of people about us. Some
of those mentioned above may feel a vague pleasure when their rooms are
filled with a chattering crowd of more or less well-assorted guests; if
that is denied them, can find consolation for the outlay in an indefinite
sensation of having performed a duty,—what duty, or to whom, they would,
however, find it difficult to define.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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