Few idiosyncrasies get more quickly on American nerves or are further
from our hearty attitude toward strangers. As we are far from looking
upon wandering Englishmen with suspicion, it takes us some time to
realize that Americans who cut away from their countrymen and settle far
from home are regarded with distrust and reluctantly received. When a
family of this kind prepares to live in their neighborhood, Britons have
a formula of three questions they ask themselves concerning the
new-comers: “Whom do they know? How much are they worth?” and “What
amusement (or profit) are we likely to get out of them?” If the answer
to all or any of the three queries is satisfactory, my lord makes the
necessary advances and becomes an agreeable, if not a witty or original,
companion.
Given this and a number of other peculiarities, it seems curious that a
certain class of Americans should be so anxious to live in England. What
is it tempts them? It cannot be the climate, for that is vile; nor the
city of London, for it is one of the ugliest in existence; nor their
“cuisine”—for although we are not good cooks ourselves, we know what good
food is and could give Britons points. Neither can it be art, nor the
opera,—one finds both better at home or on the Continent than in England.
So it must be society, and here one’s wonder deepens!
When I hear friends just back from a stay over there enlarging on the
charms of “country life,” or a London “season,” I look attentively to see
if they are in earnest, so incomparably dull have I always found English
house parties or town entertainments. At least that side of society
which the climbing stranger mostly affects. Other circles are charming,
if a bit slow, and the “Bohemia” and semi-Bohemia of London have a
delicate flavor of their own.
County society, that ideal life so attractive to American readers of
British novels, is, taken on the whole, the most insipid existence
conceivable. The women lack the sparkle and charm of ours; the men, who
are out all day shooting or hunting according to the season, get back so
fagged that if they do not actually drop asleep at the dinner-table, they
will nap immediately after, brightening only when the ladies have
retired, when, with evening dress changed for comfortable smoking suits,
the hunters congregate in the billiard-room for cigars and brandy and
seltzer.
A particularly agreeable American woman, whose husband insists on going
every winter to Melton-Mowbray for the hunting, was describing the other
day the life there among the women, and expressing her wonder that those
who did not hunt could refrain from blowing out their brains, so awful
was the dulness and monotony! She had ended by not dining out at all,
having discovered that the conversation never by any chance deviated far
from the knees of the horses and the height of the hedges!
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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