The Weavers: a tale of England and Egypt of fifty years ago - Volume 2 — John Shaqi
The Weavers: a tale of England and Egypt of fifty years ago - Volume 2Parker, Gilbert
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The Weavers: a tale of England and Egypt of fifty years ago - Volume 2
Parker, Gilbert
Society of Friends -- Fiction
There was a touch of indignation in her voice. Somehow she seemed moved
to anger against him. Her hands were clasped at her side rigidly, her
pulses throbbing. He stood looking at her fixedly, as though trying to
realise her. His silence agitated her still further, and she spoke
excitedly:
"I could have, would have, killed him myself without a moment's regret.
He had planned, planned--ah, God, can you not see it all! I would have
taken his life without a thought. I was mad to go upon such an
adventure, but I meant no ill. I had not one thought that I could not
have cried out from the housetops, and he had in his heart--he had what
you saw. But you repent that you killed him--by accident, it was by
accident. Do you realise how many times others have been trapped by him
as was I? Do you not see what he was--as I see now? Did he not say as
much to me before you came, when I was dumb with terror? Did he not make
me understand what his whole life had been? Did I not see in a flash the
women whose lives he had spoiled and killed? Would I have had pity?
Would I have had remorse? No, no, no! I was frightened when it was
done, I was horrified, but I was not sorry; and I am not sorry. It was
to be. It was thetrue end to his vileness. Ah!"
She shuddered, and buried her face in her hands for a moment, then went
on: "I can never forgive myself for going to the Palace with him. I was
mad for experience, for mystery; I wanted more than the ordinary share of
knowledge. I wanted to probe things. Yet I meant no wrong. I thought
then nothing of which I shall ever be ashamed. But I shall always be
ashamed because I knew him, because he thought that I--oh, if I were a
man, I should be glad that I had killed him, for the sake of all honest
women!"
He remained silent. His look was not upon her, he seemed lost in a
dream; but his face was fixed in trouble.
She misunderstood his silence. "You had the courage, the impulse to--to
do it," she said keenly; "you have not the courage to justify it. I will
not have it so.
"I will tell the truth to all the world. I will not shrink I shrank
yesterday because I was afraid of the world; to-day I will face it, I
will--"
She stopped suddenly, and another look flashed into her face. Presently
she spoke in a different tone; a new light had come upon her mind. "But
I see," she added. "To tell all is to make you the victim, too, of what
he did. It is in your hands; it is all in your hands; and I cannot speak
unless--unless you are ready also."
There was an unintended touch of scorn in her voice. She had been
troubled and tried beyond bearing, and her impulsive nature revolted at
his silence. She misunderstood him, or, if she did not wholly
misunderstand him, she was angry at what she thought was a needless
remorse or sensitiveness. Did not the man deserve his end?
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