Her head dropped weakly upon her arms; useless tears started. Before that
day she had had some joy in this cottage. There were glorious sunrises from
the lake and sunsets over the desolate marshes. The rank swamp grasses were
growing long, covering decently the unkempt soil. At night, alone, she had
comfort in the multitudinous cries from the railroads that ribbed the
prairie in this outskirt of the city. The shrieks of the locomotives were
like the calls of great savage birds, raising their voices melodiously as
they fled to and fro into the roaring cavern of the city, outward to the
silent country, to the happier, freer regions of man. As they rushed, they
bore her with them to those shadowy lands far away in the sweet stillness
of summer-scented noons, in the solemn quiet of autumn nights. Her days
were beset with visions like these--visions of a cool, quiet, tranquil
world; of conditions of peace; of yearnings satisfied; of toil that did not
lacerate. Yes! that world was, somewhere. Her heart was convinced of it, as
her father's had been convinced of the reality of paradise. That which she
had never been, that which she could not be now--it must exist somewhere.
Singularly childish it seemed even to herself, this perpetual obsession by
the desire for happiness,--inarticulate, unformed desire. It haunted her,
night and morning, haunted her as the desire for food haunts the famished,
the desire for action the prisoned. It urged on her footsteps in the still
afternoons as she wandered over this vast waste of houseless blocks. Up and
down the endless checker-board of empty streets and avenues she had roamed,
gleaning what joys were to be had in the metallic atmosphere, the stunted
copses, the marshy pools spotted with the blue shields of fleur-de-lys. For
even here, in the refuse corner of the great city, Nature doled out
niggardly gifts of green growth--proofs of her unquenchable bounty.
This hunger for joy had included no desire for companionship. When her
child died, the last person had slipped out of her world. To-night there
was a strange, almost fearful sense that this vacant, tenantless life might
change. Was there some one among these dull figures that would take life,
speak, touch _her_?
There was a movement in the rooms above. She started. Had she locked the
door securely? Preston had tried before to drag himself out of the cottage,
across the intervening lot, to the saloon on Stoney Island Avenue, whose
immense black and gold sign he could see from his chamber. That must not
happen here, in the neighborhood of the Everglade School. She must keep him
well concealed until he should be strong enough to go far away, on the old
round of travel and debauch, from city to city, wearing out his brutishness
and returning to her only when spent.
The movements above increased. He was pounding at the door.
"Are you going to let me starve? Where are you?" the sick man called out
querulously.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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