"One day something was needed from the station, and I rode Buckskin down
to get it. The station was a couple of miles from Jordan's house. Thirty
or forty cowboys were there on a lark, and all had been drinking a
little.
"They hailed me boisterously and wanted me to drink. I laughingly told
them I never drank, and good-naturedly threatened to make it hot for the
whole band if they did not behave themselves. I had neither coat nor vest
on, and they could all see I had no weapons about me. They all laughed,
for they were a jovial, good-hearted crowd.
"But just then this rough Turner showed up and said: 'Who is threatening
to make it hot for us?'
"Half a dozen of the boys explained that I was only joking, but Turner
was bent on mischief.
"'He won't drink with us, hey? Well, we'll drink with him,' he said, and
turning to me ordered me to call up the crowd and treat, or tell the
reason why.
"I replied that one reason was that I did not very often drink, and
another was that I never drank on compulsion.
"He was frantic in a moment, and suddenly drew his revolver. I caught the
barrel and turned it up just as he fired, then took it from him, handed
it to one of the boys, and told him to keep it until Turner had time to
reflect on what a fool he was making of himself.
"He was only the more furious at that. He sprang backward two or three
feet, then drawing a huge knife made with it a savage lunge at me. I
seized his wrist, and after a brief struggle wrenched the knife from his
hand, but still holding his wrist told him that unless he grew quiet I
should have to box his ears.
"The boys laughed and jeered at this, which only further incensed the
ungovernable brute, and he declared that he would give $100 for the
chance to whip me in a fair fist fight.
"At this I released his wrist and told him he should be accommodated. The
boys gathered in a ring around us. Turner came at me like a wild beast,
but he had no scientific use of his hands and I had had a little
practice.
"I knocked aside his blow with my left, and with the open palm of my
right hand gave him a sounding box on his left ear.
"The cowboys yelled with delight at this, crying, 'Turner, did you hear
that?'
"Turner rallied and made another rush at me. This time I struck his blow
aside with my right hand and boxed his right ear with the palm of my left
hand.
"So the business continued for several seconds. I never closed my hands,
but just boxed him right and left, the boys fairly screaming with joy,
until I finally gathered all my strength and gave him one resounding
cuff that sent him full length to grass, the most abject-looking, baffled
bully that I ever saw.
"Seeing how completely whipped he was, I went to him, and taking him by
the arm, said, 'Turner, you were right about my treating; come in and
take a drink with me. There's nothing like exercise to make one thirsty.'
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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