"You are right!" cried Grey eagerly, all his faculties suddenly starting
into life, and his mind for the first time seizing upon the idea of
getting certain knowledge speedily. The torpor which had fallen upon his
intellectual faculties at the moment of the explosion left him, and he
not only warmly seconded the old man's plan, but before the other could
speak, had secured and was seated in one of the many flys which had
already begun to arrive with helpers and friends at the scene of the
wreck.
In a few seconds the fly was spinning along in the direction of
Daneford. Both the men in the vehicle were too much occupied with their
own concerns for conversation. Grey's thoughts ran on:
"She is dead. Beyond all doubt she is dead. Poor Bee! poor Bee! I wonder
did she think of me with her last thought. I wonder was she glad or
sorry to go. And now that she is gone, my poor Bee, I don't know how I
feel.
"Poor Bee, I shall miss her. I have been unkind and unjust to her. I
have treated her cruelly, cruelly. My being unkind and scornful to her
did no one any good. It hurt her, and it hurt me. Poor thing!
"The house will be strange now. The rooms where she has been will feel
so quiet, so useless. What is a house for but a woman? A man does not
want a house of many rooms. Least of all does he want a house of many
rooms haunted by a memory. A man wants only two rooms, one to eat in and
one to sleep in. When a childless man's wife dies he ought to give up
housekeeping. What is the use of hollow rooms all round a man's head?
They are only chilling storehouses of recollection."
Here his mind halted a long time. When he resumed at the point where he
had left off, he added but one more thought:
"I'll sell the Manor."
He paused much longer, said to himself, as though he were familiarising
himself with the whole situation by repeating the words forming the key
to it:
"I'll sell the Manor."
After going over the words so often that they began to lose their
meaning, he started suddenly:
"No. I cannot sell the Manor. I cannot sell the Manor House. A man in my
position must have a house. A man in my position----
"My position! My position! My position!
"Curse it, why can't I keep my head clear? I am not going mad, I should
hope. What an amusing maniac I should make just now! The people would
gather from all sides to hear honest Wat raving about stealing the
property of the baronet. It would be town talk. Never was mad-mad so
mad, they would say. But let me get on----
"Of course a man in my position ought to have a house. I must have a
place to see my friends in. I must entertain a little and----"
His thoughts paused again a while, and then he abandoned thinking on
the line he had been following with the mental exclamation: "No, no! I
must not think of that now. I must not think of that--over the open
grave of poor Bee!"
He shook himself and endeavoured to fix his mind on matters of the hour,
and to keep it free of the future:
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account