Lesbians -- England -- Social conditions -- Fiction
Stephen answered slowly: ‘I’m frightened now—I’m frightened of you.’
‘Yet you’re stronger than I am—’
‘Yes, that’s why I’m so frightened, you make me feel strong—do you want
to do that?’
‘Well—perhaps—you’re so very unusual, Stephen.’
‘Am I?’
‘Of course, don’t you know that you are? Why, you’re altogether
different from other people.’
Stephen trembled a little: ‘Do you mind?’ she faltered.
‘I know that you’re you,’ teased Angela, smiling again, but she reached
out and took Stephen’s hand.
Something in the queer, vital strength of that hand stirred her deeply,
so that she tightened her fingers: ‘What in the Lord’s name are you?’
she murmured.
‘I don’t know. Go on holding like that to my hand—hold it tighter—I
like the feel of your fingers.’
‘Stephen, don’t be absurd!’
‘Go on holding my hand, I like the feel of your fingers.’
‘Stephen, you’re hurting, you’re crushing my rings!’
And now they were under the trees by the lakes, their feet falling
softly on the luminous carpet. Hand in hand they entered that place of
deep stillness, and only their breathing disturbed the stillness for a
moment, then it folded back over their breathing.
‘Look,’ said Stephen, and she pointed to the swan called Peter, who had
come drifting past on his own white reflection. ‘Look,’ she said, ‘this
is Morton, all beauty and peace—it drifts like that swan does, on calm,
deep water. And all this beauty and peace is for you, because now you’re
a part of Morton.’
Angela said: ‘I’ve never known peace, it’s not in me—I don’t think I’d
find it here, Stephen.’ And as she spoke she released her hand, moving a
little away from the girl.
But Stephen continued to talk on gently; her voice sounded almost like
that of a dreamer: ‘Lovely, oh, lovely it is, our Morton. On evenings in
winter these lakes are quite frozen, and the ice looks like slabs of
gold in the sunset, when you and I come and stand here in the winter.
And as we walk back we can smell the log fires long before we can see
them, and we love that good smell because it means home, and our home is
Morton—and we’re happy, happy—we’re utterly contented and at peace,
we’re filled with the peace of this place—’
‘Stephen—don’t!’
‘We’re both filled with the old peace of Morton, because we love each
other so deeply—and because we’re perfect, a perfect thing, you and
I—not two separate people but one. And our love has lit a great,
comforting beacon, so that we need never be afraid of the dark any
more—we can warm ourselves at our love, we can lie down together, and
my arms will be round you—’
She broke off abruptly, and they stared at each other.
‘Do you know what you’re saying?’ Angela whispered.
And Stephen answered: ‘I know that I love you, and that nothing else
matters in the world.’
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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