Lesbians -- England -- Social conditions -- Fiction
The splendid new motor arrived from London, to the great delight and
excitement of Burton. The new suits were completed and worn by their
owner, and Angela’s costly gold bag was received with apparent delight,
which seemed rather surprising considering her erstwhile ban upon
presents. Yet could Stephen have known it, this was not so surprising
after all, for the bag infuriated Ralph, thereby distracting his facile
attention for the moment, from something that was far more dangerous.
Filled with an ever-increasing need to believe, Stephen listened to
Angela Crossby: ‘You know there’s nothing between me and Roger—if you
don’t, then you above all people ought to,’ and her blue, child-like
eyes would look up at Stephen, who could never resist the appeal of
their blueness.
And as though to bear out the truth of her words, Roger now came to The
Grange much less often; and when he did come he was quietly friendly,
not at all lover-like if Stephen was present, so that gradually her need
to believe had begun to allay her worst fears. Yet she knew with the
true instinct of the lover, that Angela was secretly unhappy. She might
try to appear light-hearted and flippant, but her smiles and her jests
could not deceive Stephen.
‘You’re miserable. What is it?’
And Angela would answer: ‘Ralph’s been vile to me again—’ But she would
not add that Ralph was daily becoming more suspicious and more
intolerant of Roger Antrim, so that now her deadly fear of her husband
was always at war with her passion.
Sometimes it seemed to the girl that Angela used her as a whip wherewith
to lash Ralph. She would lead Stephen on to show signs of affection
which would never have been permitted in the past. Ralph’s little red
eyes would look deeply resentful, and getting up he would slouch from
the room. They would hear the front door being closed, and would know
that he had gone for a walk with Tony. Yet when they were alone and in
comparative safety, there would be something crude, almost cruel in
their kisses; a restless, dissatisfied, hungry thing—their lips would
seem bent on scourging their bodies. Neither would find deliverance nor
ease from the ache that was in them, for each would be kissing with a
well-nigh intolerable sense of loss, with a passionate knowledge of
separation. After a little they would sit with bent heads, not speaking
because of what might not be spoken; not daring to look each other in
the eyes nor to touch each other, lest they should cry out against this
preposterous lovemaking.
Completely confounded, Stephen racked her brains for anything that might
give them both a respite. She suggested that Angela should see her fence
with a celebrated London fencing master whom she had bribed to come down
to Morton. She tried to arouse an interest in the car, the splendid new
car that had cost so much money. She tried to find out if Angela had an
ungratified wish that money could fulfil.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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