Love stories, German; Sisters -- Fiction; Suicide victims -- Fiction
"Martha was still asleep. When I looked through the chink of the door
into her room, I saw her lying with her head thrown far back on the
pillow, and heard her short heavy breathing.
"I crept away, quite easy in my mind, to take up my office as
housekeeper forthwith.
"'She shall no longer work herself to death,' I said to myself, and
rejoiced in my heart. I spent fully an hour going the round of the
premises, during which I formally took the management into my hands.
The old housekeeper showed herself willing, and the servants treated me
with respect. I should anyhow soon have enforced it for myself.
"At the breakfast-table I met Robert. A slight palpitation, which
overcame me on entering, ceased forthwith when I bethought myself of my
yesterday's vow. Calmly, firmly looking into his eyes, I stepped up to
him and gave him my hand.
"'Is Martha still asleep?' I asked.
"He shook his head. 'I have sent for the doctor.' he said, 'she has
passed a bad night--the excitement of seeing you again seems not to
have done her good.'
"I felt somewhat alarmed; but my great resolve had so filled me with
peace and happiness, that I would not give way to fear.
"'Will you help yourself?' I asked, 'I should meanwhile like to look
after her.'
"When I entered her room, I found her still lying in the same position
in which I had left her early in the morning, and as I approached the
bed, I saw that she was staring up at the ceiling with wide-opened
eyes.
"I called out her name in terror; then a feeble smile came over her
face, and feebly she turned towards me and looked into my eyes.
"'Are you not feeling well, Martha?'
"She shook her head wearily, and drew up her fingers slightly. That
meant to say: 'Come and sit by me!'
"And when I had taken her head in my arm a shudder suddenly ran through
her whole body. Her teeth chattered audibly: 'Give me a warm cover.'
she whispered, 'I am shivering so.' I did as she bade me, and once more
sat down at her side. She clutched my hands, as if to warm herself by
them.
"'Have you slept well?' she asked, in the same hoarse falsetto voice
which was quite strange to me in her. I nodded, and felt a hot sense of
shame burn within me. What was my grand unselfish resolve, compared
with this sort of noble self-forgetfulness, which was evident in every
act, however great or small, and was inspired by the same love for
everything? And I even prided myself on my lofty sentiments, conceited
egotist that I was.
"'How did you like the arrangement of your room?' she asked once more,
while a gleam of slight playfulness broke from her mild, sad eyes.
"In lieu of answer, I imprinted a grateful, humble kiss upon her lips.
"'Yes, kiss me! Kiss me once more!' she said. 'Your mouth is so nice
and hot, it warms one's body and soul through.' And again she shivered
with cold.
"A little later Robert came in.
"'Get yourself ready, my child.' he said, stroking Martha's cheeks,
'our uncle, the doctor, is here.'
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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