Closing his eyes and putting his finger tips together, Pinny Penny began solemnly: "The Northern-most country of Oz is the Land of the Gillikens, famed for its luscious grapes, plums, wisteria, and heather. It is a purple country and is ruled over by Joe King and Queen Hyacinth, who live in an amethyst trimmed castle high in the Gilliken Mountains. The Eastern Empire of Oz is a yellow country, known for its wheat, corn, butter, pumpkins, daffodils, and gold mines. Nick Chopper is Emperor of the Winkies and this singular ruler is entirely made of tin plate and celebrated in song and story as 'The Tin Woodman of Oz.'" Pinny Penny paused a moment to catch his breath and then continued quietly: "The Southland is red and noted for its strawberries, tomatoes, beets, red birds, red wood, and red-heads. Glinda, the Good Sorceress, governs the Quadlings, who make up its inhabitants, and she knows as much magic as Ozma herself--" "Oh, it's one of those magic places where one just snaps the fingers to get what he wants," sighed the King discontentedly. "Well--well--go on--" "The Western Country of Oz is blue," continued Pinny Penny obligingly, "and everyone has heard of its famous blue ridge mountains, its blue birds, its violets, its blue skies and its capital, the Sapphire City. Cheeriobed is King, and Orin is Queen of the Munchkins, and they live in the Sapphire City, in almost as much magnificence as Ozma in the Emerald City. Is that all you wish to know?" "About the army?" muttered Skamperoo, wrinkling up his forehead. "Has this girl ruler a great army stationed at her capital?" Pinny Penny grinned in spite of himself. "The young fairy ruler of Oz is opposed to all wars and fighting and has at her court an army consisting of one tall soldier with green whiskers," he explained hurriedly. "One soldier with green whiskers!" shouted the King, nearly tumbling off his throne. "I never heard anything more ridiculous in my life. I thought you said Oz wasn't a joke and yet you stand there and tell me about an army of one soldier. Why, that's the funniest thing I ever heard. Ha, haw, haw!" "Laugh if you wish," said Pinny Penny resignedly, "but don't forget that Ozma has more magic appliances at her finger tips than we have pebbles on our desert. In her palace lives the famous Wizard of Oz, who can work every sort of transformation and enchantment, but does so only for the good of the country." "Humph!" exclaimed the King. "Well, how many fighting men have we?" "Seven hundred Skampavian soldiers in each of the seven counties," answered Pinny Penny reluctantly, "but let me warn your Majesty that the idea you have in your head is sheer madness and will lead to nothing but ruin. Take off your crown, put on your night cap and dream away this foolishness." "And a fine looking crown it is," snapped the King, snatching off his crown and looking at it angrily. "But these emeralds will brighten it up a bit, eh, Pinny Penny?"